Friday, May 31, 2013

And Then, I Photographed a Snapping Turtle for National Geographic

That National Geographic didn't ask me to take the photos, nor do they know I even inhabit the Earth, is beside the point. 

The point is that this morning, when I was outside crouched on the lawn, under the hot, blazing Virginia sun, sweat beads dribbling down my forehead into my squinted eyes, and soaking through the cotton fibers of my red, polka dotted pajama bottoms, causing them to adhere to the ample form of my backside like rain-soaked leaves on a sticky windshield...

Sorry, where was I?

Oh, yes, so anyway, while I was out there sweating on my lawn, photographing the Eastern (Common) Snapping Turtle - who so hospitably allowed me to make her acquaintance - I imagined that (in another life, perhaps), I should have been a National Geographic photographer. 

But more importantly, that's what I'd planned to tell the two nice(?) men who saw me taking pictures in my sweat-soaked pajamas (and hair), and decided to stop and get out of their truck to get a closer look (at the turtle). (I hope they're pleased with themselves. Like, hellooo, I was in my pajamas.)

And, in spite of all that, the good news is: I get to show you my magnificent turtle girl!
Her name is Magnolia (Maggie for short).

This is Maggie (as taken with a telephoto lens, as I hadn't yet gotten the nerve to get close).

(It didn't take me long to get the nerve...) Hello, gorgeous! (I mean it, y'all.)

Hey, wait up! 

Showing me her best side.

Heading towards the street (yikes!)...

This photo was taken at the approximate time the two (aforementioned) nice(?) men walked over to investigate.
And, yes, they took several photos with their own (phone) cameras.

Check out the points on her shell and her spiked tail!

She did not look both ways, by the way, but I did.

MADE IT ACROSS!

One more sidewalk to maneuver...

And she's rid of me! :)

A few Eastern (or Common) Snapping Turtle facts (from Wikipedia and the VA Dept. of Game and Inland Fisheries):

<> They commonly live up to 30 years in the wild (40+ in captivity).
<> They are omnivores, preferring to eat dead (but not rotting) fish.
<> They are aggressive (on land) when threatened, but rarely bite humans. In water, however, they are docile and when encountering humans, usually slip away without incident.
<> Females lay eggs (usually in June) on dry, sandy land, away from water. (Fact: Several years ago, we saw one dig a hole and lay eggs at the edge of our property. Could have been Maggie.) :)
<> In Virginia, adult snappers have no natural predators (other than humans).
<> They are the state reptile of New York.


Thank you for indulging the wanna-be zoologist/wildlife photog in me, friends!
(Especially if reptiles make you squeamish. Sorry.)

And for staying with me this long, guess what you get?

All these other (furry) "wildlife" photos I took today!


Canis Jon Farlimus Runswithbonesanddropsthemonyourpinkietoe-imus


I didn't do it.


Canis Dewimus Talksjusttohearhimselftalk-imus


I didn't do it, either.


Trouble


Felis Bertimus Toocuteforhisowngoodimus


Butt-sniffimus


Who is the smarter of the two, I wonder?


Felis Maddoximus Onlyhasonefacialexpressionandthisisit-imus

At least they're cute, right?!

Have a fantastic weekend!

Monday, May 20, 2013

Classic Cardigan: I Love Potty Humor and I Can't Help It

But first, here's a photo of the boys that I "swiped" from Jodi, the talented (and award-winning) dog blogger at Kol's Notes - Tips and Tricks from the DIY Dog...



She took it on Saturday, while at the BlogPaws pet blogging and social media conference in Tysons Corner, Virginia. I was not there.          

OK, yes I was! ;) (That's partly why I'm posting this "classic" today...because I'm old and tired, y'all.)

But anyway, about that photo. So, we were in a large dining room at the conference hotel, in the middle of zillions of people (and some other pets), when Jodi kindly gave me a baggie of some of her homemade carob dog treats, and then Dewi got completely fixed on the bag in my hand, and stood up on his haunches (as pictured), and did a show for everyone in the room, which made me a very proud dog mama! (JF did tricks and made me proud, too, by the way.)

And, there you go! The dogs represented at BlogPaws. :) They (and I) had a wonderful time. More on that later.

Today, though, I'd like to re-share a story I wrote over two years ago, which for the longest time (like up until last week), I had forgotten about. Because it's "hiding" under a post title that, other than the word "turd," has nothing to do with why I find potty humor so appealing.
(Hint: It might be genetic...or a product of my upbringing. You decide. ;-)

Originally published on March 2, 2011 (under a somewhat misleading title)...

There's a turd in the litterbox! Somebody celebrate with me!



Made you look! :)     (sorry, I couldn't resist.)

image credit bandofcats.com
Preface: Somewhere, my hubby -- as he reads the blog now and then -- is hanging his head in shame. He thinks that I'm (check that -- my *whole family* on my dad's side) -- is fascinated with poop. For the record, I strongly disagree; however, I will admit that growing up, the subject (poop) was discussed freely. To be exact, my father (quite matter-of-factly) believed that just about any ailment could be attributed to one's being "irregular." Headache? You must be constipated. Bad breath? Constipated. Cranky? Clogged pipes. :) So, we ate a lot of beans and greasy things (no Activia back in that day) to keep things running smoothly. And incidentally, I still had bad breath and got headaches (but was a perfect angel otherwise). (FYI: There's a sucker born every minute. :)

Why there was even that *one* time when -- fairly early in our courtship -- my then boyfriend (now hubby) was over for dinner. He (boyfriend) must have turned down a second helping of butter beans (or some other mushy form of fiber) when my dad -- in his best Sheriff Andy Taylor drawl -- exclaimed, "B___, Ahh SUMtimes wurreh 'bowt yer reg-ye-LAIR-teh!" (Translation: "B___, I sometimes worry about your regularity!")  The rest of the meal was a blur.  I'm surprised I didn't get dumped (pun intended). :)

*****

But, enough about me!  You might recall from yesterday that my old cat, Charlie, has been down with some bad tummy upset (hint: not constipation), which at her age, could have conceivably been her demise. However, this morning, there in her own private litterbox -- a turd! The old girl is still in the game. :) What a relief!

Carry on, y'all. :)

Chocolate, anyone?

In Memoriam: Charlie (Chatting it up in kitty heaven), 1991 - June 2, 2011

Sunday, May 12, 2013

Classic Cardigan: A Virtual 'Motherly' Day Card from the Dogs (and a Note to the Mystery Human Who Let Them Use Her Credit Card Online)

Yes, you read that right: A human (who remains a mystery, as of this writing) recently succumbed to my pets' (yes, all seven) wily ways and allowed them to use her credit card to order this:


No, not Maddox (the cat), the whimsical little doggy-shaped planter with the lovely yellow-flowering plant inside. The UPS man left it on my porch yesterday. It bore this card:



To that brave and generous person (who is not my husband, by the way; he would never let the animals use his plastic online): Thank you!
You
(I mean, all my pets) totally made my day! And it's so CUTE!
 

Jon Farleigh and Dewi have such great taste, do they not?!

I think it's time you got us our own credit cards.

I'd like mine peanut butter flavored, please!

And with those words of dog-wisdom, I'd like nothing more than to share (with all of you) a post I wrote for "motherly" day last year. I hope you enjoy it doubly this time!

Originally published on May 11, 2012...

A Virtual Motherly Day Card from Jon Farleigh and Dewi



Please note that "Motherly" Day includes anyone who has ever behaved in a motherly fashion toward another living being. In other words, YOU.

To: All our readers and peeps
From: Jon Farleigh and Dewi

We would like to give you all of these things:
























Have a happy day, friends!

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

What If LOL Cats Were LOL Cicadas?

Like, for example, this...

unaltered image: Gerry Broome/AP via NPR.org
caption: mine

It could work, no? ;)

OK, maybe not. But US East Coast-ers, just a tip: they'll be here at any moment, so you have three choices 1) run for your lives (in a westward-ly direction) 2) hide in your homes for the next two (or so) months 3) get the dang bug some Visine before it dies, already!

Oh, and...

Cicada Mania

And now is the part where I give you something warm, fuzzy and hilarious with which to (virtually) scrub the previous images from your traumatized retinas!

For instance, this...


Oh, wait! That's Maddox's stink eye. My bad.

OK, this...

Muah
So, frankly, I don't know what Maddox is doing up there; just like I don't know what Dewi's doing down here...


(But Dewi's a dog, and I digress.)

I do know, however, that Bertie (as pictured below) -- in addition to being warm, fuzzy and funny -- has a nurturing personality. And, how do I know this?

Because not a day goes by (by golly) that he doesn't make sure his pet Canada Goose (aka Goosie) gets at least one good meal and a drink of/swim in the water!

OK, swim, little guy; I'm waaaay-ting.

Time's up, Goosie! Food's gettin' stale!

nomnom...MindifIjoinya?...nomnom

So, have you forgotten about those cicadas yet (now that I've reminded you about them)? (sorry)

Well, that's okay, because I wanted you to be good and grossed out before I told you about the 1,000+ other warm, fuzzy and HILARIOUS cats over at Petfinder's



The Funniest Cat Contest!

Why? Because you need to look at more funny cats!
(to exponentially increase your happiness quotient!)

Like Kahlua, here...
(Hint: Click photos to see the kitties' details on Petfinder.)


And this guy named Spice...


(Seriously, people, I've already browsed through hundreds of funny kitties over at Petfinder, because... I couldn't tear myself away!)

So, have you got a funny cat of your own? (All cats are capable of being funny, btw; I should know.)

Then enter him/her in the contest (through May 21, 2013) and you could win a $250 gift card (for yourself) and $4,500 for your favorite Petfinder adoption group!

Thinking of adding a cat to your family? 

Oh, goody! There are plenty just waiting for you to take them home!



LOL cicada, LOL cicada, LOL cicada...
Go look at the funny kitties on Petfinder already! sheesh!

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