Tuesday, February 25, 2014

7 Unexpected Ways Living With Dogs Is Like Living With Babies

Based on my personal experience, having had three of each (dogs and babies). For the record, I came up with a whole page of hand-written ways; these are just a few of the less obvious ones.

1. A formed BM (after a sustained period of "unformed" BMs, aka horrible, explosive s#^t that necessitates a bath/shower/laundry/or infected item(s) thrown--using tongs and rubber gloves--in the outside garbage) is cause for loud celebration.

Soft, warm pretzel, anyone?

2. Leaving the house with either (baby or dog) requires one to tote an ample supply of plastic poo receptacles, both of which--when loaded--are like toxic hot potatoes, and must be thrown far, far away, to avoid olfactory assault, dry heaves and perceived ridicule from random passers-by.

Same sh*#, different butt.

3. They both eat crayons. Which makes for colorful #2.


4. Sometimes, they need a pacifier to satisfy their oral fixations.


5. Even though the toilet is only 5 feet (or less) away, they throw up on the floor/bed/a person.


6. They make accessorizing outfits a breeze.


7. For entirely different reasons, you'll want to bite their feet.


And, lastly (because I can't resist, and I certainly wouldn't want you to think having dogs and/or babies is a bad thing), one obviously AWESOME way living with dogs is like living with babies...

Their mega-watt smiles might make you melt into a quivering pile of goo!


By the way, the resemblance* is uncanny, don't you think?

So for anyone else out there who's had experience with both dogs and babies, got anything to add to the list?

*****

You know what? While I'm at it, living with cats is like living with babies, too. Yeah, they can't keep their clothes/shoes/vital accessories on for 5 minutes!

See what I mean?

Darn cat. ☺


* Really? You think 6-month-old me looks like Jon Farleigh?? (hehe) Perhaps I'll make that collage of the two of us my new profile photo. People be like, "Dang! A baby writes this blog?!"

20 comments:

  1. Lol! These are great! My 2 year old just keeps pooping more and more each day... my first daughter was potty trained before she was 2, thankfully. But this one doesn't seem ready yet. I am so happy when I get a formed "turdball"! And yes, if Shiner poops inside for some rare reason formed is definitely best! One thing I can think of is that they both sometimes get in the trash when they see something they want in there.

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    1. Ann, if I had a nickel for every time I've exclaimed out loud, "Yay! A turd!" well, I'd have a bunch of nickels! :) And, the trash? Oh, my! Ew! (FTR, whining and begging were #s 1&2 on my hand-written list - but too obvious for the post. ;)

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  2. That is very sweet and we chuckled at the bit about the finishing touches to any outfit. Have a wonderful Wednesday.
    Best wishes Molly

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  3. Bwa ha ha! Sorry no human babies in this household. But I'll never look at a hot pretzel the same way again.

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    1. Sorry, Pamela. I just wan't feeling the Hershey on this one...(runs into the kitchen to get herself a bowl of ice cream with fudge swirls and chocolate covered pretzel nuggets) ;-)

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  4. You wrote: "Their mega-watt smiles might make you melt into a quivering pile of goo!"

    Are you sure you didn't mean " a quivering pile of Poo ??!!"

    Just sayin' .... :-)

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    1. A quivering pile of poo?! Aaaaaagh! Groossssss! Eeewwww!

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  5. This is hilarious! No babies here - but from what I've heard - this is dead on. Especially the poo thing. I feel like I spend half my life examining Blueberry's poo to make sure everything is status quo. ;)

    ReplyDelete
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    1. Blueberry poo (kinda sounds like a flavor of pudding, or something). SORRY! Yes, I totally know how it feels to be poo obsessed. But, how else are they gonna tell us when something's off?

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  6. Well, now, if we ever have kids, I feel prepared! :)

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    1. Considering your furry baby's somewhat recent bout of tummy upset (all over your house - so sorry :/), I think you were probably already prepared!

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  7. Hilarious and so true, I love the pictures and the comparisons!!

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    1. You must have experience. :) Thank you for taking the time to tell me so!

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  8. No little ones here of the non-furry variety, but from what I've observed of my nieces and nephews, yep - this is right on. Too funny. Especially like the "same s$%t, different butt." LOL.

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    1. Thanks, Jackie. There's just a lotta poop, ya know? Always cleaning up poop. :)

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  9. In the puppy stage, both will chew on anything (including mommy's fingers).

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    1. Yes, right? Babies can bite! And they both stick everything in their mouths...and drool...(I do not miss the teething stage. at. all!)

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  10. I have always told people that having pets are just like having children!

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