Sunday, July 27, 2014

What Do Free Jones Natural Chews Have to Do With Free Reese's Peanut Butter Cups? Well, I'll Tell You.

OK, so you know how Reese's crack Peanut Butter Cups are may favorite drug food candy? (If not, consider yourself educated.) Well, OMG, if the Hersheys people didn't tell me that they'd noticed I'd mentioned their product a few times on social media, and for their upcoming blog anniversary, they were wondering whether I'd like to mention them again, except this time, they'd give me a giant bag of free ones to eat, AND they'd give me another giant bag to give away to a reader! And, I was like, "Does a Pooh bear eat honey out of a tree?!!"

Except, y'all, this is a dog (and sometimes cat) blog, and the Hersheys people don't even know I'm a person (which means I didn't get free candy), but the good news is: the JONES NATURAL CHEWS people (who make the equivalent of Reese's PB Cups for dogs) know I'm a person, and that this is a critter blog, and it was THEM who asked if we wanted the giant bag of crack Lamb Lung Puffs for the dogs to eat, and another for us to give away to a reader! (And, Jon Farleigh and Dewi* were like, "Do people poo in a tiny porcelain pool?!") Yay!

(*Except, the dogs needed me to type their hearty acceptance "speech" to the Jones people, which I did. And that concludes the disclosure portion of this post. ☺)


Jon Farleigh is a crack, I mean JNC Lamb Lung Puff junkie.



So, Lamb Lung Puffs. Sound delicious, right? Um, noooooo! Ewwww!! (Was what I initially thought, but then, I am not a dog, and these are dog treats.) And then I remembered the time I accidentally ate some lung myself, picking whole, steamed Maryland blue crabs, when I was much too hungry to be working so hard for a shot-glass-sized portion of shellfish. (Here's a tip: Love steamed crabs, but get something else to eat, if you're starving, unless you want to accidentally eat a lung [or intestine], in haste.) And I didn't die, or even get sick. It just tasted kind of bitter (compared to the sweet, succulent, butter-drenched crab meat). So there.

Which brings me to the top FIVE reasons why I love Jones Natural Chews Lamb Lung Puffs for my dogs:

  1. They're made in the USA of all-natural raw protein sources (from USDA-inspected meat packing facilities).

    Single Ingredient = Awesome
  2. The company was founded over 100 years ago in New York, by a dog-loving professional meat cutter named Jones, and has remained (now headquartered in Illinois) in the Jones family ever since.

    Lamb Lung Puffs look like pieces of dried-up well-done meat. They smell like it, too. 
  3. My dogs LOVE them! (They've loved every type of Jones treat they've ever eaten.)

    Training treat, anyone? ☺
  4. I can buy them from Amazon.com (not an affiliate link), my favorite online retailer.

    See Bertie? Yes, the cat. He chewed a small hole through the back of the treat bag one night, when it was still in the box it shipped in. Now, guess whether my cats like lamb lung treats (as much as the dogs do).  
  5. They use everything in their treats but the "squeal...or moo, bleat, cluck, etc." In other words, just because WE might not like to eat a lung, or trachea, ear, esophagus, etc., doesn't mean another meat-eating animal wouldn't be thankful to get it! Don't let that nutritious protein go to waste, I say!

    So, do my cats like lamb lung? YES! BONUS! (OK, half of the cats like to eat lamb lung. The other three are weird.) Also, Bobby Flay O'Fish likes to play with the treats before he eats them. Typical. 
Now, whose dog (and perhaps non-picky cat) wants to win a giant half-pound bag of Jones Natural Chews Lamb Lung Puffs?! 

(You'd better all be raising your hands, yo!) Leave a comment (and record it on the Rafflecopter) and you just might! (Extra entries awarded to those who like Jones Natural Chews on Facebook.)

I'll email the winner! Good luck!

* Entrants must have a U.S. or Canadian shipping address. 


Happy second bloggiversary, Jones Chews! Chronicles of Cardigan is honored to be a part of your celebration!



I touched a lamb lung, and I liked it. No, let me rephrase: I touched a lamb lung, and didn't hurl up a lung.  Neither will you (hurl).



Guess what? Maddox loves Lamb Lung Puffs. I'm not even kidding. See his tongue?




I told you! Maddox is to lamb lung puffs as Mikey is to Life cereal.
(Note: For sound, h
over in the upper left corner and click the speaker icon. Do it.)



Is it weird that I talk to my pets this way? Never mind.☺


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Monday, July 21, 2014

That Picture Don't Make a Lick of Sense: Just What Kind of Show Is This?


Hope you didn't think I'd run out of material for this little blog feature (since it's been a little longer than usual since the last one). Because, no.

So, are you ready?! Cool!

Tell me, WHAT IN THE WORLD is going on in this picture*?


* Some of you might remember this one. In fact, some of you gave me the idea for some of the choices you're about to see. So if you do (remember), congratulations! You've been reading longer than my kid has been able to ride a bike! (Not really, but it's close.) THANK YOU! ☺

A. The old man in orange is getting a cheap thrill. 
B. The poodle is getting a cheap thrill.
C. The older lady is horrified because she knows the old man is getting a cheap thrill. 
D. The older lady's Pomeranian is reciting "Old MacDonald" in his head, while plotting how he's gonna get the treat out of my hand. 
E. I'm trying to get Jon Farleigh to lie down for a treat, because we're contestants in a "best trick" dog contest at the local fall festival. 
F. A., B. and C.

Leave your guess in the comments or on the Facebook page! Thank you!

*****

As for the previous installment...



E. They're cheap Statue of Liberty hats from Target; they were posing for patriotic holiday shoots; and I had no idea how to put them on correctly. You'd think for $1, they could print some directions on the price stickers!

Ta da!



Totally worth the $1, by the way.

'Til next time! ☺

Thursday, July 17, 2014

Tacky Cardigan: What the Ground Might Say to a Dog - Baseball Edition

Have you ever thought about how much abuse the ground takes? Especially from dogs? Wonder what it might say, if it could talk? What's that? Only whack-o's wonder about such things? OK, I'll give you that.

Also, I'm really sorry. You'll know why momentarily.



Anyone going to see a baseball game this weekend? ☺

Note: I know full well that no baseball diamond ever entertained a game in the snow. It was the only picture I had, OK? And I took it by accident last winter. Whack-o and sick-o are not synonymous!  



Want me to consider a photo of your pet(s) for a tacky cardigan? (hehe, I bet you do! not!) Just post it to the Facebook or Tumblr page!

Sunday, July 13, 2014

Your Dog Is Housebroken, So Why in Frell Aren't Your Clothes? (T-Shirt Review + Giveaway!)

So, you wear your t-shirt around all day (including to take your dog outside to use the grass facilities), but then, just as soon as you change into your sleep attire, the shirt up and leaves a dirty mess all over your chair/carpet/bathroom floor/wherever you threw it?! Like it couldn't wait until it got to the wash?! Well, I'm here to tell you that you don't have to live that way anymore: Simply switch to wearing t-shirts from HouseBROKEN Clothing!


Disclosures:

  • This is a review of my new t-shirt from HouseBROKEN Clothing, BUT I made up the part about shirts leaving dirty messes on your stuff, as if they can poo and pee. That part was my 11-year-old self writing a tacky infomercial. 
  • HouseBROKEN Clothing sent me the t-shirt I am wearing in this article, without my paying for it. That means, naturally, that I had to pick out the shirt I wanted (read: desperately wanted) from all their designs. Which I did (while squeeing from the privacy of my own home), and then (because I was so excited to get the t-shirt), I couldn't wait to plaster pictures of it all over my blog, in return.
  • I also got (for free) a discount code for all of you readers, plus one for myself, which I'm gonna use when I order (and pay for) the other t-shirt that I'll be giving away to one of you.
    Update 7/20/14: Because they are awesome, HouseBROKEN Clothing is picking up the tab for the giveaway, too. They insisted. And, they rock.  
*****

Look at my new t-shirt, y'all!


OK, bigger...


And, in greater detail...


Pit Bulls for Peace! ☺ I LOVE it! Does anyone remember the post I wrote about sweet William (the beautiful brown brindle pittie at the Richmond SPCA, who had Cardigan Welsh Corgi DNA, according to his Wisdom panel)? Yeah, well his smiling face might as well be up there on that shirt! And, I've already worn it (to show off my soft spot for the pitties) all over the local creation!

Here's what it looks like with me in it*...


* Yes, that's me, but you should know that I used the weight-loss and wrinkle remover tools in PicMonkey, while editing all of the photos containing my person.


The natural choice (I think) would be to pair a t-shirt with denim, or shorts; therefore (being an odd ball), I went with a gray, jersey knit skirt and hot pink sneakers. For the record, the tee looks great with my jeans, too.



Before ordering, I asked Ashley (at HouseBROKEN) about the ladies' shirt sizing. She told me they run a bit small, so if I like a little room in my tee, I should go up a size, which I did. Please observe that I am not a skinny girl, and probably would never be mistaken for a boy (if you know what I mean), so I ordered a size large. It fits me perfectly. The shirt is well-made, hearty (NOT paper-thin/see-through), soft, and has just enough stretch (so not to adhere to problem areas).

So, Other Than Your Cute T-Shirt, What's So Special About HouseBROKEN Clothing?

Here's exactly what sold me:
  1. Their all-American production process. All their shirts are hand printed in Florida (at their own printing shop) on soft cotton jersey, in a variety of flattering colors. And Scott, who co-owns the company with his wife Ashley - personally creates all** the artwork. Described by himself as "artistic humor," these whimsical and quirky, completely original and mostly animal-related shirts are RIGHT UP MY ALLEY.

    The pit bull shirt is clearly my favorite, but this doxie in a party hat (among others in the shop) totally makes me happy, too.


    You'll find poodles, Basset Hounds, bulldogs, pugs and chihuahuas, among other breeds, in the collection, too. All tees are available for purchase at both their website store and Etsy shop.
  2. Shipping is FREE to addresses in the US and Canada! No minimum! Always! YAY!
  3. They are animal-lovers and give back to their local no-kill animal shelter! A portion of every sale is donated to the Peggy Adams Animal Rescue League, Humane Society of the Palm Beaches in Lake Worth, Florida. How cool is that?
** Although Scott is an artist, he's not too proud to consider one of your t-shirt designs. So, if you think you've got something that'll float his (and his customers') boat (my words, not his), just shoot him an email.

And, now for the FUN part!

FIRST: See something you like? Use the code Cardi10 at checkout (good on both the web store and Etsy) for 10% off your order!

SECOND: One lucky reader (with a US or Canadian mailing address) is going to win their own "Pit Bulls for Peace" tee! (In winner's choice of ladies' or men's style.)

Enter using the Rafflecopter below! I'll email the winner. Good luck!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

BONUS! Outtakes from the photo shoot!


"A package for me?" (Um, no.)


Hmm? There's a t-shirt in there? (Yes, in fact there was. Minimal packaging = free shipping and a cleaner environment.☺)


"Girl, I know she [the mail carrier] didn't just roll outta here without leaving me a package!"


Doo doo doo, tra la lala....


"Pit bulls for a piece? A piece a what? They got a shirt that says corgis for a piece a chickin? Or how bout some pie? As in pizza?" 



Note: This is NOT an outtake; it's Chantilly, a (peaceful, precious and pretty) pit bull available (as of this writing) for adoption at the Richmond SPCA! GAH! What a face! (I hope that link to her profile leads to a dead end, which means she found a home, by the time you read this. No offense.) 


Hot pink (KEEN, on clearance) sneakers. That is all.

Wednesday, July 9, 2014

Tacky Cardigan: Wherein I Turn Corgi Anatomy Into a Workweek Metaphor

Yes, that's right. In honor of hump day (which is today, at least where I'm sitting), I have created an infographic of the workweek, except it's really a corgi.
Note: Corgi is NOT to scale. Just pretend you're mini Mike Teavee from Willy Wonka.



According to my calculations, I'll be positioning my butt on the fur slide in less than three hours. I hope it's a smooth ride!

So, tell me: What, if anything, will you do differently on Monday, knowing that you're about to enter the Cheeky Forest? Will your outlook for the week change at all? ☺




If you'd like me to consider a photo of your pet(s) for a tacky cardigan, just post it to the Facebook or Tumblr page!

Wednesday, July 2, 2014

That Picture Don't Make a Lick of Sense: Fashion Statement or Medieval Dog Weapon?


 OK, you guys (you all, y'all, yous, you 'uns)! Are you ready? OK, go!

WHAT IN THE WORLD is going on in these (yes, two, nearly identical, except for the dog) pictures?!



A. I don't understand the question; they look perfectly normal wearing those Hannibal Lecter-like face masks.
B. We were testing out a top-secret product in development called SCAT, CAT! It was designed to keep cats out of your dog's "personal space." (And, incidentally, it works. Unfortunately, though, the cats laughed so hard, they peed outside the box; therefore, we could only rate it 1.5 stars.)
C. I signed the dogs up for a new sport called "Canine Gladiators," and these are their face masks.
D. They're summer BBQ food catchers. If a hot dog (for example) is dropped on the flat part, the dog will only be able to stare at it and drool. In theory. Really, really STUPID theory.
E. They're cheap Statue of Liberty hats from Target; they were posing for patriotic holiday shoots; and I had no idea how to put them on correctly. You'd think for $1, they could print some directions on the price stickers!

Leave your best guess in comments or on the Facebook page! (Yes, I realize the answer is obvious this week, but I don't care. In fact, I don't care if you make up your own answer, as if none of my choices matter a hill of beans! I just like to read your answers, OK?!)

*****

As for last week's picture...


E. I was sad that Jon Farleigh and Dewi had stopped stealing the TP out of the bathroom, like they did as puppies, so I tried to rekindle their desire.

Yes, I did that. They had NO desire. They grew up. Waaaaaaah!

BUT, I did happen to get video of them stealing toilet paper from the bathroom, while they were still puppies. And I used it to make a video parody of Mission Impossible. Have you seen it? (You should!)



My precious boys.☺

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