Wednesday, January 21, 2015

5 Ways My No-good, Broken Dishwasher Triggered a Happiness Windfall for My Dogs

My dishwasher quit working earlier this month. Naturally, it outed its state of malfunction just after I'd carefully crammed in the last possible dirty dish. (Dear dishwasher makers: Maybe think about adding a "breakdown imminent, do not load" warning chime to future models? Because the current system of "let's let her fill it all the way up and see if she cries when it doesn't start" just isn't cutting it. Thanks for listening.)



It stayed broken for nearly two weeks, because a) there is a shortage of "authorized brand A" service providers in every zip code in America, which means one will wait at least three business days (so sorry your appliance broke down on a Thursday before a holiday weekend) before the initial service call, b) the part that broke (99% of all appliance parts) is not in the van and must be ordered, and c) a second service call must be scheduled (refer to "a" above for details).



I hate washing dishes by hand. Hate, as in I'd rather set them on fire and run. I don't know why, and - for the love of dogs - I can't help the way I was born! (Hint: No judging!)




Anyway, thanks to my family's help, no fires were set and we all managed to eat without running out of plates and utensils. (Let's hear it for overcoming first world problems! ahem) The funny thing is - about three days in - I realized the change in routine was affecting Jon Farleigh and Dewi, And, if given the choice, they would've had me doing the dishes, over the dishwasher, forever. 



Because, all of this:

5 Ways My No-good, Broken Dishwasher Triggered a Happiness Windfall for My Dogs

1. It forced me to spend more time in the kitchen, near the pantry, where the corgi (and kitty) snacks are kept. For the record, I would not have given them the extra treats had they not looked so dang cute/desperate in my moments of weakness.


Might I trouble you for a snack?


Why, yes, I'm a fan of snacks. Snacks are great!


I might only have 23 more minutes to live unless you get me a snack.


I've chewed up a stool, slippers, a briefcase, a chair and all the USB chargers; don't make me chew up a pantry door, too. 

2. I repeat, it forced me to spend more time in the kitchen, and therefore, less time typing/surfing the net/not paying attention to corgis at the office computer. Apparently, I distract easily when performing menial kitchen labor.


Excuse me, I'm over here! Do I need to tap dance, too?
(Sure wish the dishwasher would break down.)

3. A friendly service technician (named John) got to come over and play with the dogs. And by that, I mean - in order to be heard over the playing - I had to yell things like:

  • "Jon, stop jumping! Oh, oops (Mr. service tech John), my dog's name is Jon too; just ignore me if you hear it!"
  • "I'm so sorry, they're just really happy to see you!"
  • "Hey, come on in! They love people; they're just loud! Jonny, stop the barking!"
  • "His favorite game is fetch; he's just trying to get you to toss the rope!" 

Yeah, turns out, corgi happiness necessitates yelling at (and confusing the heck out of) service techs named John.


OMG! It's the dishwasher fixer!


Maaaaaa! Mr. John fix-it man is AT. THE. DOOR!

4. To avoid washing dishes, we ate more pizza (which technically doesn't even require a plate). It so happens that some members of my family don't like the crust. Others LOVE it - especially with soggy bite marks around the edges. Those family members are furry dwarfs named Jon Farleigh and Dewi. It's OK, though; the carb-loading "fueled" them for their play dates with service tech John. 


No, I didn't run over the pizza with the car. This is NOT pizza (it's dried lamb lung for dogs☺). But these ARE the faces the dogs made when we ate the pizza (on paper plates). 

5. I had no choice but to use the dogs as substitute pot-scrubber cycles. It's just that when one is forced to wash dishes by hand, one can use a little help loosening cooked-on food particles, like smashed pot roast veggies and gravy, or fried egg, for example. I'm telling you, dog spit is nearly as effective as Cascade; it just doesn't smell as nice. 



Note: SIMULATED pot-scrubber cycle. That's actually dog food on doggy plates. I didn't film them licking my plate. Gross!

...Then, on the 13th day, the dirty-dish doggy jubilee was over. I guess I'm glad. I mean, why wouldn't I be glad? Could there be anything worse than being forced to spend more time in one's kitchen washing dishes (with one's dogs, cats, and family) than in front of a glowing computer screen?*

*Of course there is, you sillies! But, blast it to hades, I'd rather count grains of rice than keep washing those dang dishes by hand! Besides, there are plenty of other appliances around here that could break at any minute. Can you imagine what would happen if my washing machine went out, or my microwave? Bye bye, computer! (Talk about a doggy jubilee!)




bebebebebebebebebe

So, have your dogs (or any type of pet) ever benefited from a similar household misfortune? 

23 comments:

  1. That is so funny!! They look so happy about it, too!! :D I hear you on dishwasher woes! I don't like handwashing anything either!!

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    1. Who does like to handwash dishes? Oh, my mother-in-law! :-/

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  2. Too funny. Love all the pics. Rita sucks at replacing the scrubber cycle. She is the worst pot/dish-licker the world has ever seen. Her doggy license should be revoked! We had a big appliance mishap that benefited her - our fridge died last year and we had to quickly eat all the cheese and meat. I mean seriously.... what happier words has a dog ever heard than "We need to eat all this cheese and meat as fast as we can!"

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    1. Oh, Rita. What will your mom ever do? ...Maybe feed you all the cheese and meat! :D I FORGOT about the fridge! So sorry yours broke down, but OMG, YES! Dog partay!

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  3. Those blessings in disguise ... LOL. out guys LOVE helping in the kitchen.

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    1. Kitchens must be like Disney World for dogs, but their tickets only get them on 2-3 rides in a day. Having no thumbs must be so hard!

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  4. Hilarious! Mr. Spock the Cardigan loves to "help out" by prewashing the dishes before they go in the dishwasher. My husband doesn't believe the dishwasher has the ability to clean the subsequent dog spit off the dish. Oh well.

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    1. Haha! My husband might have felt that way once, too! Go Spock!

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  5. You can talk to visitors over your barking dogs? Wow. Three must really be the difference because there is never any hearing of anything except for barking when anyone comes to the door... For like twenty minutes. I just hand whoever soda and we wait...


    My mother-in-law suggested that my new baster would last longer if I washed it by hand when she was over at Thanksgiving. I had to inform her that "I don't believe in things that can't go in the dishwasher."

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  6. @Bethany, I can't imagine the decibel level at your house when someone knocks at the door! When my dogs are particularly riled up, I do have to step outside and shut the door before I can speak. Or, I have to pick up Dewi and hold him to speak. He won't bark while he feet are off the floor. :)

    Yeah, my MIL doesn't own a dishwasher, by choice. (Can you imagine?) I can't stand the thought of greasy food residue and particles being left on something that got hand washed - turkey baster included. MUST be dishwasher safe. :)

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  7. We have lived in our NYC apartment since 1998. We have a small diishwasher in our kitchen that we have used just once all these years. ONCE! It's basically used for storage with all our extra glasses and tupperware in there.

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    1. Well, no wonder you're eating out all the time! You only used it once? Crazy talk! ;)

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  8. too funny - like you, mom would rather do anything than dishes..... but hey - there was pizza :)

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    1. Pizza makes most everything better! :)) Thanks for stoping by!

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  9. So funny, I'm not a fan of doing dishes by hand either. I'd rather mow the lawn - which makes no sense because our lawn is huge and takes forever. Pizza was a great choice, things always get better when pizza is involved. I remember when I was having our new heating system installed and my previous dog Carter fell in love with the main service guy Gary. By the 3rd or 4th day he'd start whining and getting all excited as he was pulling up the driveway. The odd thing was he didn't want to play with him, or he was at least respectful - he just sat quietly beside him for hours watching him work. Gary said he didn't mind, I think I asked him a billion times. On the last day Gary bought Carter a rope toy, and I've been recommending that company ever since.

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    1. (UGH! Blogger obliterated my first comment! I hope you don't see both - and how I couldn't remember everything I typed the first time!)

      Jen, that story about Carter and Gary is SO sweet! I bet you were beside yourself with pride and affection (for Carter, not Gary)! I can totally see it playing out in my head. A national repair company should get with it and hire an ad agency to reinact this exact scenario during next year's Super Bowl. Move over Budweiser dogs! :)

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  10. That made us smile and more time in the kitchen is certainly something all dogs like. Have a fabulous Friday.
    Best wishes Molly

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  11. You are funny! I have a dishwasher that I've never, ever used. I can't stand em. When I visit my brother and SIL, they use theirs all the time and I try and help them load it but I have tell you - it seems like a lot more work than just hand washing dishes. First you have to scrape, then rinse, then load. That's a lot of steps. With hand washing, I just scrape, then soak them in the soapy side, wash them and then rinse. Easy peasy. I dunno, I guess I am old fashioned. And I'm not even that old! ;)

    But you are correct - dog saliva is super effective for getting stuck on foods off plates. I know people think it is gross, but a) I never do that in front of company and b) it's not like I consider the plate clean and just throw it back up in the cabinet.

    P.S. Since I am a hand washer - I do admit that in the summer when the last thing I want to do is stand over a sink full of hot water - I will use paper plates and plastic forks. I'm tough on the environment.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. I used to find folding laundry relaxing. I guess maybe washing dishes is relaxing for some (you would know, I bet!). My MIL thinks loading the washer is work, too. Guess it's a skill that one has to master with lots and lots of practice - as my kids can attest to (as they are lacking that skill). I always have to reload their dishes. But I'd still rather do that than wash them! :)

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  12. Luna always demands that I don't need to use the dishwasher. She can do the job!

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    1. Does Luna ever try to do the job while the dishes are IN the dishwasher? JF and Dewi (especially JF) like to clean plates while I'm loading. I have no idea why I find that (licking plates in the dishwasher) disturbing, but handing them MY plate to lick, not so much. :)

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