Friday, November 24, 2017

2 Things (including burning up the vacuum motor) My Pets Are Sorry For + Enter to Win $575 in Prizes (incl. a vacuum)!



Don't let their innocent faces fool you; an hour before I got this photo, they both (freakishly) shed their entire undercoat and immediately grew it all back. In that same hour, I (freakishly) vacuumed the entire house twice, and attempted a third time, except the 3,001,297 strands of corgi fur wrapped around the carpet attachment's brush-roller (that I'd neglected to inspect, even though the last time the vacuum broke, the shop said it was because the fur of 1,001 corgis was wrapped around the roller) got severely tangled, and burnt up the motor beyond repair. The corgis were distraught, so I put them in the pen (pictured) to think about the consequences of shedding. In the end (after 1.76 minutes), they simply issued an apology, and vowed not to shed as much, at least not on carpeted areas, rugs, upholstered furniture, lamp shades, or dark-colored clothing.  

Note: Numbers reported in the above paragraph are rough estimates. 
Note: My use of the term "rough estimate" in the above sentence is a rough estimate of the actual definition of rough estimate. 


I own this book. I got it for free from the author. It's so funny, I bought the three others in the series with my own money. 


Speaking of shedding on dark-colored clothing (which all my pets are sorry for)...that is not my Boston Terrier on that adorable-and-also-crude book cover, nor does it represent my dogs' shame (they've never humped a leg--a CAT, or EACH OTHER, though?). Anyway, when I was at the BlogPaws conference last spring, Jon Farleigh (my red fluffy corgi) and I got into an elevator with a guy wearing all black (I think--it might have only been 96% black, but I round up). Picture Bono, or Johnny Cash, except he didn't look anything like them (plus Johnny Cash is dead, may he R.I.P)...anyway, it's a good thing he broke the awkward elevator silence by speaking directly to Jon Farleigh (who was visibly on the verge of exploding with feelings of profound love and affection toward the complete stranger). Because after doing so--and hence, inviting the dog to thrust his entire, blonde-coated, fluffy, molting, gyrating corgi being directly on the aforementioned black outfit, resulting in my mortification--it got out that he wrote funny books about pets being sorry. 

And the next day, he gave me a copy of that one with the Boston Terrier on it. I knew then--after matching the author's headshot on the book cover to the actual person--that I had, in fact, met the real (vs. fake) Jeremy Greenberg--comedian and author of several pet-centered humor books that are in big book stores and make charming holiday gifts for people who love pets, have senses of humor, and can read.  



That's Jon Farleigh in a hotel room at BlogPaws. He wasn't sorry in this photo, because the couch is p/leather so his fur didn't stick. 



That's also Jon Farleigh at BlogPaws (it was in Myrtle Beach). You can bet he was sorry for dumping the sand that had gotten lodged up in the undercoat on his undercarriage all in the backseat of my car, the hotel lobby, and bathroom floor in my room. 

The point of that elevator story, in case you've forgotten how you arrived here, is that Jon Farleigh (not I) should have apologized for jumping up and smearing his loose fur all over the author's black pants. But since Jon Farleigh's not ever getting a mention in a "Sorry I..." book, I'm giving him a pass. Sorry, Jeremy*. 😉

* It's OK, we're friends now. And I'm not really sorry.





So, there's this giveaway...

(Isn't that the REAL reason you're here, after all? It's totally OK.) Yep, we're co-sponsoring--with nine other pet bloggers, for our second holiday season--a fun giveaway, with three pet-friendly prizes (and they're huge)! Read on for details, including how you can enter on all 10 sponsors' blogs, and what you might win, just in time for the holidays!

Here are the other nine pet blogs bringing this awesome giveaway to you!

And these are the prizes!

Y'all, I'd love an Amazon shopping spree and I know you would, too! You know what else I'd love? The cordless PET vacuum (for the corgi tumbleweeds) AND that $75, Etsy shop spending spree! Yes, give it all TO ME! Alright fine; you can have it. I'll just be over here with fur all over my clothes, being happy for you when you win. 

* The 10 participating bloggers each contributed their own money toward the Amazon gift card.
** 2nd and 3rd place prizes have been donated by their respective brands, Black+Decker and the Everyday Dog Mom blog.

Once again...YOU CAN ENTER TO WIN ON ALL 10 PARTICIPATING BLOGS!

Yep! To increase your odds, simply visit all the blogs (linked above) and enter (but hurry, all entry forms will all close at 11:59 p.m. EST on Thursday, November 30)!

One "finalist" will be randomly selected from each blog!

Then all of the finalists' names will go into a drawing, during which three winners will be randomly selected to receive the prizes listed above.

This is great news! That's because even if one of the 10 blogs has 467 times more entries than another, EACH BLOG will still get one finalist in the drawing! (FYI: Chronicles of Cardigan produced the 3rd prize winner in a previous pet blogger holiday giveaway!)


Ready to enter? Yay! But first, you'll have to comment on this blog (and I will check, yo)...so, tell me: 

What's one thing your pet(s) is sorry for (or you are sorry for, on behalf of your pet)? 

Done commenting? Get entered, using the giveaway tool below!

Paws & Santa Claws Holiday Giveaway

Well, did you enter? Yay! I hope you win! Don't forget you can enter at the other nine blogs (linked at the top of the post) to increase your chances! 

I'll post all three winners' names on the Facebook page and Twitter the first week of December!

Good luck!


About the giveaway: 

No purchase necessary. Giveaway is open to US and Canadian residents age 18 and older, except where prohibited by law. Giveaway will run from November 24 to November 30, 2017 at 11:59pm EST. Three (3) winners will be randomly selected and notified via email. Winners will have 48 hours to claim their prizes; failure to do so will result in forfeiture of the prize. Twitter and Pinterest do not sponsor, administer, or endorse this promotion. Participants must read and agree to Gleam’s Privacy Policy before entering and participating in this promotion. By entering this contest, participants grant permission for their email address to be added to the Chronicles of Cardigan mailing list. 


Each participating blogger paid an entry fee which will be used to fund the grand prize. The 2nd and 3rd place prizes were generously donated by the participating brands. Please be sure to visit their websites to see all the incredible pet products they have to offer.





My friend Jeremy (the real Jeremy Greenberg, who invited Jon Farleigh to be bad in an elevator) wrote this book, too. Cats hardly ever apologize for anything, and that alone is worth the read. Except, I'm telling you to read it (or give it to someone else to read) because it's funny, and full of cute cat photos. Like Facebook, except you don't need to log in, or read about your "friend's" politics. 

159 comments:

  1. I feel bad when having to leave pets at home to go to work

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  2. My dogs bark at every person who walks by my house, I think they apologize for all of that.

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  3. My dog is sorry for digging in the trash and chewing everything up.

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  4. My dog feels sorry for leaving penny stains on the sheets. Maybe. She probably doesn’t feel that sorry about but it makes me feel better to believe she does.

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  5. My dog is sorry for barking at our neighbor

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  6. maybe my dog is sorry for waking me up early mornings, but then maybe not.

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  7. Dexter should feel sorry for leaving poop bombs in the house when it's rainy outside and he won't go do his business in the rain.

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  8. Theo nabbed and ate 6 hamburger rolls one day. He was not the tiniest bit sorry.

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  9. She nipped the neighbor yesterday...

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  10. My cat would be sorry for missing the box sometimes.

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  11. When he gets excited he will pee. WE had an incident the other day on the bed. Thank you for the chance to win!

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  12. My dog would be sorry for licking people too much or jumping on them excitedly.

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  13. My Border Collies apologize for being so wispy. They can't help it - comes with the breed. They are very sorry that they have a complete and total meltdown whenever we watch a college football game. They can't stand the cheering we do and they try to crawl under a rock and become invisible. I feel sorry for their fright and panic but I'm still going to cheer on my team.

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  14. I'm sorry for standing on your arm while you are trying to type.

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  15. He he! I have a similar story. We had trouble docking against rough winds in Beaufort, NC. Luckily, the nice woman from a boat nearby caught our lines and helped to pull us in.

    When Honey and I got off our boat to thank her and introduce ourselves, she called her two daughters (all 3 of them wearing black, of course) to meet Honey. Who proceeded to leave every ounce of hair she could shed all over them.

    I spent the next half hour helping them get the fur off themselves with my collection of lint rollers.

    Turns out the woman was Behan Gifford, a writer and teacher who has been sailing around the world with her family for over a decade. She's about as famous and revered in my sailing/cruising circles as say, Elizabeth Keene is in dog blogville. :)

    Honey, by the way, was not sorry. Even a little bit.

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  16. My pup is sorry for getting into the garbage this week.

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  17. My Tuc is sorry for bringing home stray cats. He can't help it though because he has a big heart and he knows that I am a sucker for animals. He has collected 3 cats this way. He thinks that he is their mother.

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  18. My dog is sorry for going through the bathroom garbage can and bringing "treasures" all around the house.

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  19. My dog is Sorry for being so hyper and jumping on everyone.

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  20. My cats would be sorry for throwing up on the carpet ...

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  21. My dog is sorry for barking every time a door shuts.

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  22. My dog is sorry for picking on the cats and squishing them.

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  23. My dog is sorry when he knocks over the trash bin

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  24. my dog is sorry for the socks that have been destroyed :)

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  25. Meebers is sorry that she can only do her morning yoga stretch, hanging front legs from the computer screen and it has to be while I am using the computer.

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  26. I am sorry I didn't rescue her sooner She has brought great joy to our family and kids she loves everyone even our mail man. She runs up and licks all over everyone

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  27. Taz is sorry for doing her business next to mother in laws chair... or maybe she's not!

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  28. My cat is sorry (not sorry) that she hogs up the bed, nags and bites us to demand treats, gets kitty litter everywhere, wakes up at random hours during the night to play and asks to be walked to her food to be petted and gets hair on everything. lol We love her cheekybutt!

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  29. My dog is sorry for getting muddy outside and then running all over the house before we could clean his paws off!

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  30. My cat is sorry that she always has gas lol

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  31. My cat apologises for nothing. He just judges. I still love him though. My dog is a good girl and has nothing to be sorry about.

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  32. Galen is sorry for eating things out of the bushes when I'm half asleep and later throwing up in his crate :(

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  33. I hate leaving our dog Marley home alone long nights while we have been super busy past mth.

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  34. Leaving our dog home alone makes me feel bad.

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  35. I am sorry for inflicting 3 younger boy cats on Satin (our only female).

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  36. I am sorry for my pooch's behavior around other dogs. He always gets put in his place by our cat and bigger dog, so he tried to intimidate any other dog we see.

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  38. Izzy is sorry that she gets so impatient to go out that she bites my wrist when she tries to get my attention. She then always licks me to say I am sorry, but I gotta go bad :)

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  39. Well, my Kenji SHOULD be sorry for barking so much but he’s too busy barking to care.

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  40. hehe my pup is sorry for peeing on my sisters back. haha

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  41. Attitude when having tummy mats removed. Sorry, not sorry.

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  42. There are so many ! But one of them, i hope, is when my golden retriever puppy accidentally ate a box full of brownies ! We rushed him to the vet in time ! He was fine afterward but i felt bad looking at his sickly puppy face after they made him throw up !

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  43. My dog counter-surfed and stole my pizza -- but I'm not sure he was sorry about it! Or maybe he was! Who knows!
    digicats {at} sbcglobal {dot} net

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  44. My kitty is sorry for being so hyper in the middle of the night when I'm trying to sleep. Running across the bed (and my head) multiple times!

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  45. My Rocky is sorry for tearing up an entire kleenex box

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  46. Artie is sorry that he ate my wife's pie crust that she made for Thanksgiving. He admits that they were delicious.

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  47. My bulldog is sorry for his incredible flatulance!!

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  48. Jasper is most sorry when he tries to bite the wires. He's just teething going through a hard thing, but we love him either way.

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  49. my dog is sorry for digging holes in the backyard. I'm sure she feels bad when I trip in them!

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  50. Orion is sorry/notsorry for marking all of our moving boxes this year.... He is only sorry about this because NOW he has to wear a belly band whenever we leave the house.....

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  51. for jumping up on people wanting petted on

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  52. My doggy grabbed my daughter's backpack and went threw the bag looking for candy

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  53. my pup is sorry for chewing up the couch..lol

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  54. My dog is sorry for all the birds she has killed and for scaring the squirrels.

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  55. Sorry for not spending more time together.

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  56. Seek is sorry for having puppy accidents.

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  57. I'm sorry that Molimo is so sensitive and her feelings get hurt so easily.

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  58. My pet is sorry for all the fur he leaves behind.

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  59. Phoebe is sorry for jumping on me in the morning and licking my face until she gets me moving.

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  60. My cat is sorry for pooping in my room!

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  61. my dog Toby is sorry for peeing on the other dog

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  62. Always jumping into the bath tub when I start to run the water for my bath Lol

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  63. My Molly girl is sorry for using my bedroom as her poop site.

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  64. My dog is sorry she pooped on a rug, and made a huge mess.

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  65. I just left my dog with my brother in law for 5 days while I was out of town. I feel so bad when I have to leave him like that..it's like does he know I'm gone?? lol

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  66. My Angel would say she is sorry for being so spoiled :) LOL

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  67. My dog Poo Poo is extremely sorry for tearing up my new couch cover over the Thanksgiving holiday!!!

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  68. My cat Bugsey is so sorry for leaving so much hair around that I could make another cat out of it.

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  69. My dog Ziggy is sorry for chewing up my favorite shoes.

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  70. My cat is sorry for almost tipping the tree over and knocking some ornaments over

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  71. I am sorry for moving the litter pan and I hope he is sorry for using the bathtub because of it.

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  72. Oreo is sorry she chews up every new bed she gets

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  73. She is sorry that she tried to bite me last night because i moved her leg. Bad girl!

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  74. Scooter, I am sorry for leaving you alone.

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  75. prissy is sorry for chewing up my phone cord. lol

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  76. Phoebe is sorry for ruining 2 rugs!

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  77. Layla is not sorry but I am for burying a bully stick in my pillow case and I nearly knocked myself out

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  78. Bear is so sorry he ate the bowl of nuts on Friday night :(

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  79. I hope and pray they are sorry for finding and eating cat poop.

    candieluster(at)gmail(dot)com

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  80. Our dog Lena is sorry she had an accident in the house the other day :(

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  81. Kiki is very sorry for jumping on the kitchen table and eating my barbecue pizza!

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  82. Peeing on the kitchen floor, but then again.. my dog is 17 years old and can't hold his bladder until someone wants to open the door!

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  83. Sorry for over shooting the litter box.........

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  84. Abby is sorry she ripped her holiday sweater.

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  86. Scarlett is sorry for barking at everyone.

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  87. i am sorry that i could not save my oldest gal who passed away in Aug. this year. she had terminal cancer, we went thru 4 types of chemo and 1 new drug. she had such a strong will to live. she mystified the vets because she should have died almost as soon as they found it. i would have done anything to save her. she did not give up until the very last day. the cancer had gotten into her throat. now i am sorry for all the times i got mad at her and hope she forgives me. she was the sweetest little gal in the world.

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  88. I'm sorry he made a hole in a couch cushion big enough for him to crawl into and sleep!

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  89. Leaving a tootsie roll in basement on occasion

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  90. I am sorry for leaving them alone only just for a few hours! Also in summer, I feel bad for them, because they get so hot and we don't have an A/C unit!

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  91. Rolly is sorry for eating pillows.

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  92. My cat, Crowley, is sorry for waking me up 2 hours before breakfast to make sure I don't forget.

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  93. Annie is sorry for being a bed hog and pushing mom and dad out of her bed! Teddy is sorry for shredding all the paper in the house such as napkins, toilet paper and dollar bills🐕😁

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  94. My youngest Cat Skip Skip is sorry for every time I open the refrigerator she stands in front of me and paws at the gallon of milk and cries

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  95. My dogs are sorry for waking me up this morning barking at a cat outside before my alarm clock went off.

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  96. lol, my pups are so (not) sorry for tearing tissues and paper towels to shreds all over the carpet! :P

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  97. My pet dog Marley is sorry that he likes to eat all the kids toys and steals their stuff animals even though he has a basket full of his own stuffed animals. Their stuffed animals are better than his stuffed animals apparently.

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  98. Duffy is sorry for pulling all his toys out all over the floor when they have been picked up. They look much better all over the place!

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  99. I am sorry for chewing on furniture

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  100. My Dog is sorry for being a little ankle biter. lol

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  101. I am sorry that I have to leave my sweet fur baby boy Ozzy when we go on vacation. But he gets to stay home and be comfortable in his own own home with a dog sitter. So he's pretty happy about that. But he still pouts for a few days after mommy comes home. It's so funny to watch him pout. He will sit in my lap, but he will not look at me no way, no how, lol.

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  102. She is sorry for getting sick one time and throwing up on grandma's new rug.

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  103. My Boston Terrier has nothing to apologize for and I love him and all Bostons for that. I do apologize that I quicked his nail the other day after finally trying to cut them. :C

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  104. so sorry for sleeping on my face,

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  105. Squirrelbaitt says she is sorry for licking off your freshly iced cookies. She was unaware cat do not like icing.

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  106. He is sorry that he is so hyper and can knock you over and give you kisses.

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  107. My dog, Mandy, is sorry for getting into the garbage and licking all the food wrappers, then leaving them all over the floor!

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  108. My dog is sorry for chewing up my son's bookbag.

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  109. My Sadie is sorry for dumping her feed bowl because she plays to rough!

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  110. I'm sorry she has diabetes and is blind and ha arthritis.

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  111. "Sorry for tearing up that piece of paper and getting little moist paper chunks everywhere that you have to pick up". :P

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  112. My dog rips up paper towels and napkins left on the table, then he is sorry.

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  113. do his tremendous medical bills count?

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  114. My cat is sorry for throwing up after eating too fast all the time.

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  115. My dogs are sorry for eating my living room couch cushions while I was at the store.

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  116. My dog is sorry for sleeping with me on my twin size mattress and hogging the bed so I end up moving to the floor!

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  117. My dog is sorry for not eating breakfast /dinner and waiting for me to make a piece of chicken just for them.

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  118. My dog is sorry for barking so much!, she will bark at people who were just petting her! shes a little thing with a BIG attitude

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  119. My dog should be repentant for chewing the cushy handle from my crochet hook and tangling 2 skeins of yarn.

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  120. My dog should be sorry for destroying my sofa.

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  121. My dogs jumped onto the counter to destroy the turkey while I was taking out the trash!!! There was turkey ALL over the house!! I was only outside for 3 minutes. Haha! :)

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  122. My dog should be sorry for leaving his hair all over

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  123. My Husky Icy should definitely be heartily sorry for insisting on rubbing up against anyone wearing black she can find! She never stops shedding, maybe she and John F. should be friends. She's a constant offender.
    Love & Biscuits,
    Dogs Luv Us and We Luv Them

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  124. Chu-Chu Baby apologizes for growling at everyone, all the time.

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  125. My dogs are sorry for tearing up the paper towels and toilet paper in the house

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  126. I am sorry for peeing on the floor when I hear you drive in the yard. I just get so excited when you come home.

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  127. My dog is sorry for peeing on the floor for every time I leave the house.

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  128. I feel sorry that my dogs are getting older one is 13 and the other one 12 and it's starting to show...makes me sad!

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  129. I would hope Mama's was sorry for sleeping with her butt right in my face but I know she could care less.

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  130. Im sorry that when Im not home and my dog has to go potty he tries to eat through the door to get out. I know he isnt sorry because it keeps happening and he always looks so guilty!! lindsayhess 84 at yahoo dot com

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  131. I am sorry I tinkled on your shoes!

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  132. I know my girl is sorry for grabbing items to trade for yummy treats! Right LOL

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  133. My dogs are sorry for chewing up every shoe I ever owned until they reached the age of about 4.

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  134. My daughter's cat is sorry that it screams Everytime I pick it up but as soon as I set him down, he winds around my feet and meows. ( He's a cat, so I'm sure he's not really sorry)

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  135. MY pitty Moose is not sorry for ignoring me daily lol

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  136. I know that my youngest cat is NOT sorry for harassing the other cats lol but he IS sorry whenever he gets yelled at.

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  137. My dog Scooby-Doo is sorry for chewing you daughters barbies handso and feet,then trying to Akers the look like our other dog

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  138. How fun is this! My Kinsey girl is totally sorry for sometimes getting litter outside of the HUGE litter box that I have invested in just for her behalf. Also, Bentley, the lab-pitt is sorry for getting items out of the trash and finishing them. KO.

    starla.batesATyahoo.com

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  139. My dog is sorry for curling up in the laundry!

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  140. My dog and cats are sorry for getting their hair all over my work clothes!

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  141. For throwing up on the brand new carpet

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  142. I'm sorry for feeding Maverick too much people food. We all suffer, though. His tush just smells!

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  143. My dogs are sorry for bark bark barking at the neighbor dogs!

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  144. My cat is (not) sorry for all the hilarious sneak-ambushes she does! She’ll hide waiting around a corner or on the other side of a doorway, and leap-pounce on me as I walk past.

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  145. I love our dog. I really had a hard time coming up for something that she could be sorry for she is a wonderful dog. Tame and sweet. Only thing she really does is maybe scratch up the floor but she just gets nervous :)

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  146. My dog is very sorry for having accidents when she gets really excited at seeing company she hasn't seen in awhile. She piddles a little and it distresses her, but can't seem to help it.

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  147. Sorry for scaring the daylights out of every mail man that comes to our porch

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  148. My cat is sorry he ruins every plant we've ever owned.

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  149. My 18 year old spaniel mix is sorry for having accidents in the house. She feels really bad but can't help it due to her age and health issues. She doesn't get in trouble though :)

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  150. My little gal is sorry that she tried to eat the bees on the flowers. No, she didn't, but she tried.

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  151. I just got my new dog 2 weeks ago, but when he goes to the bathroom on the floor and before I can even yell at him for it he already has his head down.

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