A few prerequisite definitions:
Hades: (loosely defined...by me) The place where the practically dead (from loss of readership, due to chronic -- and potentially humiliating -- misuse of homonyms) blogs go.
Homonym:
<> (loosely, from
wictionary.org): A word that sounds or is spelled the same as another word, but has a different meaning, technically called a
homophone (same sound) or a
homograph (same spelling).
(
A few examples that I thought of: gross, pile, dog, dew, do)
{Come on, y'all, it's
me, here. What kind of thoughts did you expect?}
Note: In the aforementioned examples, the first three words (each) have
multiple meanings, but are identically spelled, while the last two only
sound the same.
<> (my own definition): A word(s) invented by a smart@ss, pun-loving and/or lazy person who couldn't be bothered to think of something original.
*
(Good grief, as if there aren't enough unique letter combinations in the 26-letter English alphabet!)
Oh, and just on the off chance you think this post only applies to the few and far between blogger/grammar dolts (like me): its, it's, their, there, they're, buy, by and bye are homonyms, too. (
Note: If you've never, in your life, typed any of those words incorrectly, then you might be a grammar rock star, and could get bored reading the rest of this post. Unless, that is, you like self-deprecating
** humor, in which case, read on.)
 |
This is awkward.
But not as awkward as when you accidentally publish crazy words on your blog. |
Practically-a-homonym: (my own definition): A word that sounds almost exactly like another word (often only differing by one or two letters), but has a completely different meaning.
Example:
**deprecating and
defecating
Hint: For the love of all that is dignified and good, friends, don't mix those two words up. Just don't.
*******
So, as the title indicates, I'm sharing this
not as an expert grammar scholar, but as a blogger who has typed her share of homonym mistakes. And
not because I've been policing other blogs for errors, or because screwing up homonyms is one of my pet peeves (no, if that were true, I'd be perpetually peeved at myself).
What I
am doing, however, is sharing some tips I've learned (in my nearly 3 years of blogging) for how to avoid making common (and not so common), potentially humiliating (personal examples to follow) mistakes using the wrong word(s) in your blog posts (or any other public, self-edited writing). In other words:
because I don't want you to make my mistakes. I hope they help!
1. WATCH SPELL CHECK!
And by watch, I mean:
Don't rush to select a suggested word, especially if the word you're using is one that you've never (or rarely) written before!
When in doubt - even by the slightest hair - LOOK UP the meaning of the word! It is because I misspelled "Enunciation" with an "A," and as a result, selected "Annunciation" from the list offered by spell check, that I published this (highly embarrassing)
post title (in 2011):
The Importance of Annunciation When Including a Dog in Your Holiday Card Photo Shoot
Thankfully, a concerned reader e-mailed me with my mistake only minutes after the post went live. If not for her, the title might still be out there (for horrified readers all over the globe) to this day.
(Also, the irony that I screwed up the post title because I hadn't enunciated "enunciate" is not lost on me.)
 |
| Hahahaha! Heeheeeheee! Harharhar! |
2. PROOFREAD beyond spell check!
Think spell check is gonna catch the time you type "there" for "they're"? "Who's" for "whose"? "Flee" for "flea"? Of course not! Run spell check and then read through your (entire) work. Then - if you have the time - close it, take a break and then read it again.
3. Study and memorize common homonyms.
Is it second nature for you to type "its" (vs. "it's") for the possessive of "it"? Do you know the difference between "affect" and "effect"? Are you fazed that "phase" and "faze" are frequently confused?
The good news is that there are hundreds of online resources that list (ad
nauseum nauseam***) the more common homonyms that typically trip people up in writing. Try Googling "
commonly misused homonyms." You'll see what I mean.
*** It might make you nauseated to know that the phrase "
ad nauseam" is commonly misspelled "ad nauseum." ;)
 |
| As a matter of fact, there is such a word as "throe." It rhymes with "ho," bleeches. |
4. READ! READ! READ!
Ever heard the saying "you don't know what you don't know"? Well, let me tell you, there will be times when you just flat out use the wrong word (because you simply have no idea that it's wrong), and neither hades nor high water will be able to stop you. Like the time I published
this title (in 2011):
'In the throws of a mid-life crisis, Tigger decided to cover her pesky gray hair'...
In all fairness to me, though,
how the heck was I supposed to know that "throes" was even a word, much less correctly use it?!
Well, I'll tell you: By READING (other people's writing)! Lots and lots of it!
Wanna know how I know this?
Because FIVE MONTHS LATER, after that absurd post title had lingered out on the interwebs for thousands of (Pinterest-clicking) people to see (and probably snicker at), I read the same phrase (but with the correct spelling of "throes") somewhere else. And you know what? I laughed. Okay, NO I DIDN'T, I (used "fudge" as an expletive and) fixed it! And then (in humiliation) wrote a post titled
Please, Won't You Be My Editor, in which I implored you, my readers, to inform me whenever I do something so completely NOT-brilliant, again!
Dang it, what was the point of that tirade?!
Oh yes, READING!
It's simply the only way to build one's vocabulary (short of studying the dictionary, or a dictionary-like application) to include more of the less commonly written homonyms, like "throes," for example.
So, who wants to take down some homonyms today?! ;-)
Do you have any other tips to share?
* Let it be known (and I think
Shakespeare himself would agree) that there might be at least three positive arguments for the existence of homonyms:
1. puns 2. euphemisms 3. double entendre
With that said, proceed at your own risk! ;)
P.S. Should you find an homonymic error in this post, please spell "it" in the comments. Thanks!
