The Curious ("Colorful"?) English Meanings of Words We Use for Dogs and Cats

Originally published 9/16/13.

Have you ever stood in your bathroom and thought about all the different words we use in English for dogs and cats? No? Well, I have, so no worries. 

Don't ask me what sparked it (I can't remember), the point is, if one starts with the basic English words "dog," "cat," "puppy" and "kitten," and continues to list derivations of these words, one could possibly be left with some interesting questions to ponder. 

See if you agree:

Pup

Puppy

Dog

Doggy

Kitten

Kitty

Cat

Catty*?

Things that make me go hmm:

<> Was "catty" ever a term of endearment?
<> Would dogs call other dogs catty?
<> Would cats call other cats dogs?
<> Why is English so dumb sometimes?

P.S. The "catty" photo caption is a modified pop culture reference. 25 (brag) points to the first person who can correctly say from where! (Fine, it's Mean Girls-25 points for all!)

* IMPORTANT UPDATE: It occurs to me that a (sort of, with an added "naughty/bad-girl," connotation) synonym for the term "catty" is "hussy" (defined HERE, Google, and HERE), which, if one were trying to use covertly--perhaps to sell something, could change to "husky," which is, in fact, a dog breed. Point being, let's give credit to both cats and dogs for the female slang terms that we've all come to appreciate, mostly, in a lighthearted** way. 😉

** Lighthearted, in a sarcastic way, if you prefer, or not. I mean, it depends on the context of how the slang word is used, and who's saying it, and to whom, right? (My gosh, I wrote the original of this post in 2013, before Me Too. I had NO idea how relevant (in a satirical way) this post would become, five years later, at the time.

Tacky Cardigan With Words on It: Common Sayings Taken the Wrong Way: Pet Peeve

Have you ever sat down and thought about all the sayings we American English-speakers use that if taken literally (or even just the wrong way), could make a person unversed in the vernacular, wonder how hard we must have hit our heads when we fell off the turnip truck? I mean, why we say such nonsense?

Well, I do. And, to tell you the truth, I can't believe how many sayings I use that flat-out don't make any sense. And worse, if someone pressed me about why I say them, or where the expressions originated, I'd just have to stand there scratching my head. (Like, how do I know? I wasn't born back then!) Think about it. Isn't it weird? How we do this all day, and never stop to question the sensibility of the words coming out of our mouths? Or whether there's a different way of saying what we mean?

Like how, for example, do I "fly by the seat of my pants" to go anywhere? I mean, what does that even mean - fly by the seat of my pants? Because the image I'm getting is that of an invisible hook in the sky that dangles people by the belt loops, and then, whirls them around like Dumbo's on a Disney theme park ride. But, what happens after that? When the "newbie" gets more seasoned at whatever the heck it is they're doing? Does a flying carpet whiz in and take over? Then maybe a hang-glider? Until, finally, they've mastered the thing and get to ride in a plane, only to willingly jump out with nothing but a parachute to break their fall back to the hard ground? NOPE! NOT ME! I'd just assume not ever do anything remotely new and difficult again!

Fly by the seat of my pants, huh. What a stupid thing to do!

I'm no Dumb-o! Just leave me on the ground, thanks!
via insidethemagic.net

{Insert pause here. Count off: one second, two seconds, three seconds, four seconds...}

I'm sure I was trying to make a point with all that blather...oh yes! Pet peeve*! Have you ever wondered why exactly we use those specific words for this particular thing we're trying to convey? Like, why "pet" and why "peeve"? So, OK. I know a peeve is something annoying, but why do we, then, call the MOST annoying thing possible to us, our PET? Isn't that another way of saying it's our favorite, or worse, most beloved annoying thing? But, that doesn't even make sense! How freaking annoying!

* Grammar nerds may click here and/or here for the definition of "pet peeve" and here and/or here for its origin/etymology. (By the way, the experts can't even completely agree on this "pet peeve" stuff. So, tell me, how the heck are we commoners supposed to explain what it means to someone who doesn't speak English as a first language?! Also, why do dogs dig to China? And, why have I, on purpose, just bunched up my own panties? Don't answer that!☺)

AHEM

Alright. So, I've established that "pet peeve" is a weird combination of words. Hold on to that thought for a minute...

A couple weeks ago, I decided to scoop up Jon Farleigh (he's 37 lbs.-light) and dance around the kitchen (it was Mother's Day weekend and I was feeling extra happy**; haven't you ever spontaneously grabbed your pet for a dance?). One of my kids grudgingly took some pictures. Yes, she did, and, it turns out - from her vantage point - Jon wasn't feeling the joy quite as much as I was. (Though, to me, the back of his head sure did look adorable - bobbing up and down to the beat.) I'm not sure what he was feeling, truthfully, but when I saw this particular photo, just two words sprang to mind.

Now, this? This definition of "pet peeve," I can explain.  ☺

What's your most beloved annoying expression? Have you even thought about it before today? Does your dog or cat like to dance with you? (Don't lie. hehe)

** I was extra happy, listening to this LunchMoney Lewis tune my kids found for me. I dare you not to dance. 

Chronicles of Cardigan's Top 11 Most Ridiculous Posts of 2013

Ridiculous meaning most-viewed/read/scanned/gawked at - minus two Blogger how-to's (here and here), a theme park pet care review, and a giveaway. Because, zzzzzz. (No really, none of that stuff is ridiculous; it just gets googled a lot. Which means that today, it is boring and irrelevant. ;)

A preface poem: Your eyes are like paper, and these posts are like glue. When you read them, don't get too close, lest you wind up in the emergency room...like these poor people who may or may not have gotten accidentally glued to things! (Maybe I should've just said they'd get stuck on you. Oh, never mind!) ☺

And, here you go: my 2013 reader favorites (in ascending order)!

11. Dwayne's World Presents: Bohemian Dog Rhapsody (a song parody)

Yes, I dared to go there. It was the hardest post (creatively) I've ever written (laid in my brain percolating for months). And, dang it, if I didn't use ShamWow in a sentence! Pepto Bismol too! Holy cow, what a wacky post!

10. 10 (Previously Unpublished) Reasons Why My Dogs Are Strange

There might be screaming. Crazy@ss baboon screaming. :D

9. 5 Less Obvious Reasons Why I'm Thankful for My Dogs (and How You Can #ShakeItForward)

If you think you might have just seen this one, you're right. It's less than a month old. Wow. What's even better than it making the list, though, is that Iams (for whom I wrote the post, so people would watch a funny dog video, and then for every view up to 500,000, Iams would donate a bowl of food to feed a shelter pet) recently met their goal! Half a million meals are on their way to dogs and cats across the US!

8. National Buffoon's Animal House, With a Side of Bacon

I don't have a clue how this post was borne of my brain. All I did was find a couple of cheap, bacon-patterned neck ties at Target, and the next thing I knew, my dogs were pledging a fraternity. I Smelta Pie, no less.

7. What if LOL Cats Were LOL Cicadas?

You know? I thought I was on to something with this one, but, turns out, people don't really care much for LOL cicadas. I have no idea why. Oh, and there's a really important message about shelter pets in this post. Really and truly, there is.

6. Blogger-to-Blogger Grammar Tips: How to Avoid Homonym Hades (Illustrated With Funny Pet Photos)

In hind sight, I might have been temporarily nuts for publishing a grammar guide (because when one ventures down that road, one better make darn sure one hasn't screwed up one's own grammar, lest one gets a reputation for being a blithering knitwit nitwit). Oh well! (Psst. You'll let me know in comments if I did {screw up my own grammar}, right? Please.)

5. Beer Bottle Cap Pet ID Tags, plus TAKE THE QUIZ on Dogs + Beer in Pop Culture!

So, there's the part at the beginning where I review the Guinness Extra Stout bottle cap tag I got for my kitten, Bobby Flay O'Fish, but then it veers off into dogs and beer, with a pop trivia quiz (that people can still take) at the end. ahem.

4. I Took My Dogs Into Tiffany & Co., and Why This Is Important to Me

This post is two years old, and I was NOT expecting it to be here. But while I've got your attention, have you seen the one where I take the dogs into a Tiffany's at my local dog-friendly mall? Just to say we did it?

3. I Would Do Anything for a Ball, But I Won't Do That

Wherein I test my dogs' aptitude for fetching a tennis ball. The results were shocking...and breathtakingly adorable.

2. 13 Things (besides obscenities) to Not Name Your Dog

Trust me; just don't do it. ANY of it! ☺

1. The Unbearable Cuteness of Being Free

Independence Day like you've never, ever seen it! ♥♥♥

1,000 thank you's for being the best readers a slightly deranged girl could ask for!

The Curious ("Colorful"?) English Meanings of Words We Use for Dogs and Cats

Have you ever stood in your bathroom and thought about the different words we use in English for dogs and cats? No? Well, I have, so no worries. 

Don't ask me what sparked it (I can't remember), the point is, if one starts with the basic English words "dog," "cat," "puppy" and "kitten," and continues to list derivations of these words, one could possibly be left with some interesting questions to ponder. 

See if you agree:

Pup

Puppy

Dog

Doggy

Kitten

Kitty

Cat

Catty*?

Things that make me go hmm:

<> Was "catty" ever a term of endearment?
<> Would dogs call other dogs catty?
<> Would cats call other cats dogs?
<> Why is English so dumb sometimes?

P.S. The "catty" photo caption is a modified pop culture reference. 25 (brag) points to the first person who can correctly say from where! (Fine, it's Mean Girls-25 points for all!)

* IMPORTANT UPDATE: It occurs to me that a (sort of, but with am added "naughty/bad-girl," connotation) synonym for the term "catty" is "hussy" (defined HERE, Google, and HERE), which, if one were trying to use covertly--perhaps to sell something, could change to "husky," which is, in fact, a dog breed. Point being, let's give credit to both cats and dogs for the female slang terms that we've all come to appreciate, mostly, in a lighthearted** way. 😉

** Lighthearted, in a sarcastic way, if you prefer, or not. I mean, it depends on the context of how the slang word is used, and who's saying it, and to whom, right? (My gosh, I wrote this post in 2013, before Me Too. I had NO idea how relevant (in a satirical way) this post would be at the time.

Blogger-to-Blogger Grammar Tips: How to Avoid Homonym Hades (illustrated with funny pet photos)

A few prerequisite definitions:

  Hades: (loosely defined...by me) The place where the practically dead (from loss of readership, due to chronic -- and potentially humiliating -- misuse of homonyms) blogs go.

I wish.
(t-shirt image via Mental Floss store)

  Homonym:

<> (loosely, from wictionary.org): A word that sounds or is spelled the same as another word, but has a different meaning, technically called a homophone (same sound) or a homograph (same spelling).
(A few examples that I thought of: gross, pile, dog, dew, do)
{Come on, y'all, it's me, here. What kind of thoughts did you expect?}
Note: In the aforementioned examples, the first three words (each) have multiple meanings, but are identically spelled, while the last two only sound the same.

<> (my own definition): A word(s) invented by a smart@ss, pun-loving and/or lazy person who couldn't be bothered to think of something original.*
(Good grief, as if there aren't enough unique letter combinations in the 26-letter English alphabet!)

Oh, and just on the off chance you think this post only applies to the few and far between blogger/grammar dolts (like me): its, it's, their, there, they're, buy, by and bye are homonyms, too. (Note: If you've never, in your life, typed any of those words incorrectly, then you might be a grammar rock star, and could get bored reading the rest of this post. Unless, that is, you like self-deprecating** humor, in which case, read on.)

This is awkward.
But not as awkward as when you accidentally publish crazy words on your blog.

Practically-a-homonym: (my own definition): A word that sounds almost exactly like another word (often only differing by one or two letters), but has a completely different meaning.

Example: **deprecating and defecating
Hint: For the love of all that is dignified and good, friends, don't mix those two words up. Just don't.

 ******* 

So, as the title indicates, I'm sharing this not as an expert grammar scholar, but as a blogger who has typed her share of homonym mistakes. And not because I've been policing other blogs for errors, or because screwing up homonyms is one of my pet peeves (no, if that were true, I'd be perpetually peeved at myself).

What I am doing, however, is sharing some tips I've learned (in my nearly 3 years of blogging) for how to avoid making common (and not so common), potentially humiliating (personal examples to follow) mistakes using the wrong word(s) in your blog posts (or any other public, self-edited writing). In other words: because I don't want you to make my mistakes. I hope they help!

1. WATCH SPELL CHECK!

And by watch, I mean: Don't rush to select a suggested word, especially if the word you're using is one that you've never (or rarely) written before! When in doubt - even by the slightest hair - LOOK UP the meaning of the word! It is because I misspelled "Enunciation" with an "A," and as a result, selected "Annunciation" from the list offered by spell check, that I published this (highly embarrassing) post title (in 2011):

The Importance of Annunciation When Including a Dog in Your Holiday Card Photo Shoot

Thankfully, a concerned reader e-mailed me with my mistake only minutes after the post went live. If not for her, the title might still be out there (for horrified readers all over the globe) to this day.

(Also, the irony that I screwed up the post title because I hadn't enunciated "enunciate" is not lost on me.)

Hahahaha! Heeheeeheee! Harharhar!

2. PROOFREAD beyond spell check!

Think spell check is gonna catch the time you type "there" for "they're"? "Who's" for "whose"? "Flee" for "flea"? Of course not! Run spell check and then read through your (entire) work. Then - if you have the time - close it, take a break and then read it again.

3. Study and memorize common homonyms.

Is it second nature for you to type "its" (vs. "it's") for the possessive of "it"? Do you know the difference between "affect" and "effect"? Are you fazed that "phase" and "faze" are frequently confused?

The good news is that there are hundreds of online resources that list (ad nauseum nauseam***) the more common homonyms that typically trip people up in writing. Try Googling "commonly misused homonyms." You'll see what I mean.

*** It might make you nauseated to know that the phrase "ad nauseam" is commonly misspelled "ad nauseum." ;)

As a matter of fact, there is such a word as "throe." It rhymes with "ho," bleeches.

4. READ! READ! READ!

Ever heard the saying "you don't know what you don't know"? Well, let me tell you, there will be times when you just flat out use the wrong word (because you simply have no idea that it's wrong), and neither hades nor high water will be able to stop you. Like the time I published this title (in 2011):

'In the throws of a mid-life crisis, Tigger decided to cover her pesky gray hair'...

In all fairness to me, though, how the heck was I supposed to know that "throes" was even a word, much less correctly use it?!

Well, I'll tell you: By READING (other people's writing)! Lots and lots of it!

Wanna know how I know this?

Because FIVE MONTHS LATER, after that absurd post title had lingered out on the interwebs for thousands of (Pinterest-clicking) people to see (and probably snicker at), I read the same phrase (but with the correct spelling of "throes") somewhere else. And you know what? I laughed. Okay, NO I DIDN'T, I (used "fudge" as an expletive and) fixed it! And then (in humiliation) wrote a post titled Please, Won't You Be My Editor, in which I implored you, my readers, to inform me whenever I do something so completely NOT-brilliant, again!

Dang it, what was the point of that tirade?!

Oh yes, READING!

It's simply the only way to build one's vocabulary (short of studying the dictionary, or a dictionary-like application) to include more of the less commonly written homonyms, like "throes," for example.

So, who wants to take down some homonyms today?! ;-)

Do you have any other tips to share?

* Let it be known (and I think Shakespeare himself would agree) that there might be at least three positive arguments for the existence of homonyms:

1. puns 2. euphemisms 3. double entendre

With that said, proceed at your own risk! ;)

image via cheezburger.com memebase

P.S. Should you find an homonymic error in this post, please spell "it" in the comments. Thanks! 

The Phonetics of Fostering, Part 3 - I Already Know How to Form Words So Let's Talk Semantics

So when I left you on Tuesday, I had trumped my moody fostering "vowels" with "HAPPY consonants." 

And then suddenly I felt like bursting into song! (Actually, not really.)

Truthfully, although I learned to be less hard on myself (for not being perfect), the knowledge that Maddox would soon be returning to his relatively small shelter quarters still left me unsettled. And I had to do something.

So tell me: If someone keeps an animal in foster care forever, is that technically fostering?

Yeah, my husband didn't think so either (when I told him I wanted to foster Maddox forever :).

So, that's why, yesterday, I went over to the Richmond SPCA and adopted Maddox!

I especially like this part of the adoption agreement:

"Thank you for making a precious Richmond SPCA pet a part of your family. 

Your adoption has made it possible for another animal's life to be saved. You are a hero."

I think Maddox is going to be okay with his new forever. :)

Note: I have lots more I'd like to say about how my family and I arrived here, but, frankly, it's all still so new that I haven't had time to collect my thoughts. So more to come later!

The Phonetics of Fostering, Part 2 - Consonants

Please click here if you missed Part 1 (on vowels).

Remember how yesterday I claimed I didn't really sit in my car and mull over phonetics (vowels and consonants) as a metaphor to the pet fostering experience?

Well, that was then. Today is a new day!

I hope you like metaphors. :)

Do metaphors taste like chicken?

So, consonants. There are 26 letters in the English alphabet and, with the exception of the occasional multi-tasking "Y," 21 of them are consonants. Consonants outnumber (moody) vowels 4:1.

Here are a few other things to note about consonants:

• They cannot stand alone as words (although, imo, "Mmmm" "Grrrr" and "Pftttt" are definitely "words"). ;)
• They are linguistically in contrast to (moody) vowel sounds.
• When used as an adjective, "consonant" means "in agreement" or "harmonious."

Okay, so if -- according to my way-out metaphor here -- my fostering woes are mere moody (but inevitable) vowels in a larger alphabet of agreeable and harmonious consonants, how do you think this saga played out?

Well, I'll tell you: I took a step back and made friends with some new (consonant) words! Here are a few favorites:

Humor

Acceptance

Perspective

Patience

Yummy Yogurt Yellow-bellied Sapsucker Yin & Yang ("y" words are hard)

Do you see it?! (Hint: Look at the first letter of each word.)

Even with a few inevitable (moody) vowels thrown in, Moody Vowel Syndrome can't hold a candle to HAPPY!

Stay tuned for the exciting conclusion of this series!

P.S. Have I mentioned lately what kind, good sports all of you are???

The Phonetics of Fostering, Part 1 - Vowels

If you're new to this blog, I'm fostering a senior shelter cat named Maddox. I'm also returning from a week-long blogging vacation, during which I was to "rest my tired and aging brain."

For the record: Rest is a relative term and might be highly overrated.

So anyway, while my brain got a rest from thinking up and publishing blog posts last week, it was plenty busy fretting over the foster cat situation (read: perfectionism sucks). And that, coupled with the pressure of only having four weeks with which to make the best of Maddox's shelter respite, nearly drove me nutty. 

In fact, during a bout of over-thinking in the car, I decided that fostering was making me anxious and emotional. And then I observed that anxious and emotional begin with the letters "A" and "E," respectively, causing my brain to auto-fill the next three (imaginary) blanks with the letters "I" "O" and "U," which, naturally, made me wonder whether vowels (and consonants for that matter) might be a metaphor for the pet foster care experience. 

(Not really. But it did make me wonder whether I could make an acronym representing my sad mental state, using only the letters for vowel sounds.)

And wouldn't you know it? I can!
I call it:

Moody Vowel Syndrome
(aka adverse side effect of trying to be a perfect pet fosterer)

A - Anxious

E - Emotional

I - Irritable

O - Obsessive

U - Unrested

...and sometimes Why? - Why the heck did I sign up for this?!

Maddox has "sympathy" Moody Vowel Syndrome.

To be continued...

Today's Grammar Lesson: Misuse of the Word 'Literal' with Respect to Major Pet Blogging Awards

Incorrect usage in a sentence:

OMG and SHUT THE FRONT DOOR! Our blog was just named a BlogPaws 2012 "Best Humor Blog" finalist for the literal Nose-to-Nose Pet Social Media & Pet Blogging Awards!

What I just said, in pictures:

Mom, is this funny enough for you?
How long do we have to stay this way?

Moooooommmm!!!! Tell them they can KEEP the dang nose-to-nose award!!
This blows!

Now, remove the word "literal."

OMG and SHUT THE FRONT DOOR! Our blog was just named a BlogPaws 2012 "Best Humor Blog" finalist for the Nose-to-Nose Pet Social Media & Pet Blogging Awards!

What I just said, in a picture:

The Chronicles of Cardigan is a:

Click image to see the full list of categories and finalists.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I think I'll go mumble a few more cable TV words.
(You do know Animal Planet animals have dirty mouths, right? Uh huh. Literally.)

;-)

P.S. CONGRATULATIONS to all the other finalists (in all categories); it's an honor (and so humbling) to be counted among you. Just wow!

P.P.S. Have an awesome weekend, everyone!

Chilled Dew Dew

And a lesson in the use of homophones. (smile)

Edited in Picnik using Velvia effect in Advanced > Curves

Edited in  Picnik using Polachrome Yellowed effect in Advanced > Curves

Hope you have (had) some time to chill today!

P.S. I haven't decided to quit replying to your awesome comments; I'm just going through a lazy, post-sick, need a mental and physical vacation phase. Replies will return soon. And, thank you for not writing bad things about me on a public bathroom stall.  ;-)

Please, won't you be my editor?

(Apologies to my beloved childhood "neighbor," Fred Rogers.)

Did you know that today's date is 11/11/11, which only occurs once every 100 years? Well, you do now. :)

For today's post, I tried to think of something doggie-like that would fit with the theme of the number one, but all I could think of was the color yellow. The truth is, it wasn't meant to be. That's because this morning, as I was looking over my blog, hoping to get some inspiration, I discovered a gross grammatical error in one of my older post titles.

It wasn't a dangling pawparticiple (or even a dangling preposition); that would be nothing to "sneeze" at. No, this was much worse. Well, why don't I just let you try and find it, here:

'In the throws of a mid-life crisis, Tigger decided to cover her pesky gray hair'...

Hint: I highlighted it.

FYI: If you click that link, you will see that I have already corrected the error. The word should be "throes," not throws.

Now, it's not like I wrote that post, no one read it, and I never saw it again ('til today). It just so happens that it's in my top 10 most clicked pages (who knew so many people google images of Ann-Margret with cats??), and I've seen the title like 264,511 times - completely oblivious to my error. Until today.

Disclaimer: Did you know that it's been scientifically* proven that after age 40, half of one's brain cells that control memory and eyesight go on extended vacation in The Hamptons (or someplace equally exclusive outside the US)? It's true. 

*I know it; therefore, it must be true. :)

So anyway, there I sat this morning, noticing yet another unsuspecting googler had gotten to see Tigger in a wig when - as if someone unseen had passed my tired brain a memo - I realized that after all this time and hundreds of clicks, NO ONE HAD tactfully TOLD ME WHAT A DINGBAT I AM. 

(Note: All caps yelling does not equal bitterness.)

If it seems like I'm making a mountain out of a molehill, you're probably right. It's just that in the future, when I make another grammatical mistake (the kind of mistake that cannot be classified as a typo, and will likely cause some readers to chuckle and/or wonder when/if I will ever get a clue), will you kindly drop me an email?

Would you want me to do the same for you? I really want to know!

*****

So there. I have said my peace (not piece).

Thank you and carry on with your (not you're) great weekend! :)

Bonus: Mr. Rogers singing his song!

P.S. It's (not its) "death knell" not "death nail." And if you're (not your) crying, it's "bawl" not "ball." I might have messed those up, too, somewhere along the way. :)