Classic Cardigan: A Virtual 'Motherly' Day Card from the Dogs (and a Note to the Mystery Human Who Let Them Use Her Credit Card Online)

Yes, you read that right: A human (who remains a mystery, as of this writing) recently succumbed to my pets' (yes, all seven) wily ways and allowed them to use her credit card to order this:

No, not Maddox (the cat), the whimsical little doggy-shaped planter with the lovely yellow-flowering plant inside. The UPS man left it on my porch yesterday. It bore this card:

To that brave and generous person (who is not my husband, by the way; he would never let the animals use his plastic online): Thank you!
You (I mean, all my pets) totally made my day! And it's so CUTE! 

Jon Farleigh and Dewi have such great taste, do they not?!

I think it's time you got us our own credit cards.

I'd like mine peanut butter flavored, please!

And with those words of dog-wisdom, I'd like nothing more than to share (with all of you) a post I wrote for "motherly" day last year. I hope you enjoy it doubly this time!

Originally published on May 11, 2012...

A Virtual Motherly Day Card from Jon Farleigh and Dewi

Please note that "Motherly" Day includes anyone who has ever behaved in a motherly fashion toward another living being. In other words, YOU.

To: All our readers and peeps

From: Jon Farleigh and Dewi

We would like to give you all of these things:

Dog Flowers

Colorful Springtime Garden Creatures

A Trip to Walt Disney World (without kids)

A Nice Bath (garden hose optional)

Something Sweet to Eat (hope you like gingerbread)

And a Big Sloppy Kiss

Have a happy day, friends!

A Virtual Motherly Day Card from Jon Farleigh and Dewi

Please note that "Motherly" Day includes anyone who has ever behaved in a motherly fashion toward another living being. In other words, YOU.

To: All our readers and peeps

From: Jon Farleigh and Dewi

We would like to give you all of these things:

Dog Flowers

Colorful Springtime Garden Creatures

A Trip to Walt Disney World (without kids)

A Nice Bath (garden hose optional)

Something Sweet to Eat (hope you like gingerbread)

And a Big Sloppy Kiss

Have a happy weekend, friends!

Mother's Day Revelations

(Dog content will return tomorrow; I promise.)

Sapori Ristorante Italiano

In a moment of pure revelation, yesterday just before lunchtime,

I had a vision of the perfect Mother's Day lunch,

which in the fog and noise of my mind, was free from all responsibility related to my own motherhood, including my own children.

So next thing I know (while the Hubby was off somewhere completely oblivious to my enlightenment)...

I (almost) apologetically inquired of Oldest Child:
"What would you think if instead of all of us going out to lunch, Daddy and I go out and leave the three of you home to make your own lunches?"

To which Oldest Child shot back in a panic, "No way! It's Mother's Day! We're your kids and should be with you, not Daddy!"

To which I smartly rebutted, "But on Mother's Day moms are supposed to get a break from their kids."

[silence and look of shock on Oldest Child's face]

Oh, I thought. Did I just say that outloud to my child? She's gonna need therapy, I further pondered, but yet, could not stop myself from continuing in a fit of desperation...

"But you can eat all the bagels (Dad had purchased from the local bakery that morning) and all the brownies (Middle Child had baked the previous day)...and (after mentally inventorying every snack food currently in the pantry) all the microwave popcorn you can eat!"

To which Youngest Child (who was listening) quickly chimed in, "Yay!"

To which Middle Child interjected bossily, "I call the cinnamon crunch bagel!"

To which Youngest Child whined, "But that one was mine!"

To which I reminded Youngest Child, "There are two of those in the bag."

To which Youngest Child stated in relief, "Oh."

To which Oldest Child blurted out, "Can I have the leftover taco (from previous night's dinner)?!"

To which the Hubby and I joyfully replied, in unison, "Sure!"

As I glanced around at the dirty dishes piled in the kitchen sink and remembered the baskets of folded kids' laundry needing to be put away, I had a second revelation.

Me to kids:
"Since it's Mother's Day, I'll be needing you to unload the dishwasher and then load up all these dishes, and while you're at it, I don't want to find even a crumb from your lunches when I get back, so clean it all up...and after you get done in here, put away all your laundry, and then clean the cat litter. We'll be back right after lunch, so get moving."

To which they blankly (almost robotically) replied, "OK."

I knew they hadn't heard anything I had said beyond "unload the dishwasher," but the thought of driving away to a quiet Italian restaurant -- without them -- somehow made it alright.  :)