Not Your Ordinary Photo Captioning Challenge (to Benefit Dog Rescue)!

So I have this photo of Dewi:

Yeah, I know...

[crinkles nose and gestures running feathered fingers through Dewi's butt-cheek fur (aka pants)]

SQUEEE!!!

Okay, so yeah, I have this photo and I don't think there's ever been another (of Dewi) that I've wanted to caption so badly. :-)

And that is why I've decided TO ASK YOU (my fine, creative, generous, kind, compliant...) READERS to caption it for me!

BUT! As the title of this post suggests, I'm looking for captions that aren't exactly "ordinary" (or obvious). Obvious being, for example, "Belly rub, please?" or "Hey, ya want summa this?"
Make sense? 

I don't care how "out there" these captions are; in fact, the more "out there" the merrier. This is going to be fun!

AND THE BEST PART? 

FOR EVERY CAPTION RECEIVED
(up to 75, through 11:59 p.m. ET on 2/8/13), 
I WILL MAKE A DONATION TO
a fantastic dog rescue organization,CORGI AID*!
($1.00 for each caption up to 25, and $0.50 for each caption from 26 through 75, up to $50.00 max.)

This is Lucky, an owner-surrendered diabetic, but otherwise wonderful, 8-year-old corgi boy, and CorgiAid's most recent  beneficiary. His rescue story is here.

Think you can lend a silly caption to help Lucky (and his corgi/corgi mix brothers and sisters in rescue) out?

Oh, but wait, there's more!

After all the captions are in, I'm (somehow) going to pick my favorite, announce the human commenter behind it, edit the photo with the caption, and then share it all over the virtual earth (with proper credit, of course)! Think of the bragging rights!
(Note: My virtual "earth" might not be as large as some others', but it's plenty big enough for Lucky.)

So, as a recap:

<> Submit your caption of Dewi's photo in the comments BELOW (not on Facebook or Twitter, please!)

<> Comments will close after Friday, February 8.

<> I will post the final captioned photo (along with an announcement of the submitter - by whatever ID your comment leads me to) on Tuesday, February 12 (which also happens to be Dewi's 3rd birthday). Yay!

<> Needy homeless corgis and corgi mixes - by way of CorgiAid - are going to get some financial assistance!

THANK YOU FOR PARTICIPATING!

NOW GO FORTH AND CAPTION DEWI!


* CorgiAid's mission statement (from their Home page):

CorgiAid exists to provide a framework for support of rescue efforts for Cardigan and Pembroke Welsh corgis and corgi mixes, for the enhancement of animal welfare and the betterment of mankind.

5 Places (besides the obvious, work, etc.) Where You Should NEVER LOL at a Blog

Note: And by LOL, I don't mean that "pretend" stuff we sometimes do in blog comments, just to have something nice to say. I mean real, laughing out loud - from one's gut, which may or may not include simultaneous, embarrassing bodily function(s), i.e. soiling one's pants. 

So by show of hands, how many of you have ever laughed out loud at someone's blog (or website) in an inappropriate place? (My hand is up, BTW; I laugh out loud inappropriately in lots of places.) I'm picturing a few hands waving in the air - some higher than others, no doubt. Well anyway, I thought it might be helpful - since I, for one, have never seen an article like this on any of the many blogging etiquette sites I've visited - to list a few of the places (other than the obvious: work, church services, the library) where, as a blog reader, one should never, ever laugh out loud.

I hope you find this helpful.

1. As a (live, in-person) spectator of the final round (or even worse, sudden-death playoff) at the Masters (golf) Tournament. 

(Now, I know some of you might be thinking that I have overestimated the number of golf fans who bother to read this blog; well, to those of you I say this: Do not tell me that if Ree Drummond - of the [rhymes with] Whyoneer Plummon blog - [hypothetically] gifted you an all-expenses-paid trip for you and a friend to The Masters [because it happened to coincide with one of her book-signings], that you [even if you hate golf] wouldn't be all over that trip like pollen on a car hood! :-) So, what I'm saying is that since more than a few of you - as I do - probably enter Ree's giveaways, and probably don't have intimate experience with spectating etiquette at The Masters, that I'm hopefully saving you a LOAD of potential embarrassment! I mean, is that really how you want to get late-night TV exposure? Getting arrested at an internationally televised sporting event?!)

Blowing bubbles under the water makes bath time fun!

 2. During a boring political science (for example) lecture, in which your professor - with a demented fondness for the Socratic method of teaching...in a giant lecture hall...where shy students suffer from bouts of nausea in anticipation of being called out in front of total strangers - might hear you LOL-ing, and make you read the entire doo doo-laced blog post out loud to the class! Who's laughing then?

(Talk about soiling a perfectly clean pair of pants.)

3. Observing (within earshot of the surgical team) a delicate Operation, in which the surgeon is trying to remove her patient's "wish bone" from the left side of his chest (a most awkward maneuver) using nothing but a pair of electrified tweezers, which, at the slightest slip of her hand, will set off the most annoying buzzer you have ever heard in your life! (Note: This scenario applies to many Operations, including, but not limited to, funny bone replacement and writer's cramp removal.)

4. As a VIP guest or government official (on or near the platform...and a "hot" mic) during a U.S. President's inaugural address (particularly when one has one's sights set on 2016, 20, etc.). (One would think this particular tip, above all, should go without saying. One would think.)

(What? You think politicians don't read [and consequently glean valuable tips - like this one - from] nonsensical dog blogs?)

All business here, folks. My bubble maker's set to torpedo mode.

5. Seated (on the toilet) in a stall in a (multi-stalled) public restroom (and I can't adequately express this next part enough), ESPECIALLY...ESPECIALLY when a person (who has unusually shy bowels, and who would rather suffer from constipation in private than be [audibly and/or olfactorily] detected making poo poo in a public toilet) is seated in the stall next to you!

Or even worse! If that person has innocently entered the stall to take care of #1 on her agenda ONLY, however, to her horror, erroneously emits a blast of hot methane - its sound closely mimicking a rectal trumpet, announcing her impending urination. [Insert me saying, "OMG, I feel SO bad for that woman!"]

Which then, naturally, the horrified person - in a panic-stricken haste - would inevitably wind up running out of the restroom into the busy Target store (for example) with her dress tucked into the back of her (totally hip) textured tights!

(Do you want to be the reason why a sensitive Target shopper has to begin seeing a therapist?!  I didn't think so!)

And there you go, friends. Just me trying to give something back to my awesome readers. ;-)

Oh, and remember, my blog is Pin(terest)-friendly, so feel free to tack this post up on your "blogging tips" board - just in case.

*****

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This post has been brought to you by Maddox, who rarely cracks a smile, much less laughs out loud in public.

*****

And one more thing...for my exceptionally kind friend-who-also-has-a-dog-blog, Kim T.: This is what happens when you admit (in comments) to LOL-ing at my blog in inappropriate places. I hope it was worth it! ((hugs!))

On 2012, Blogging and Elephants in the Room

(Cryptic) Note: For those who've seen the teaser I added to the Linky List, thanks for coming back; I hope it's worth the click. ;-)

A year ago January 10, I published Wherein I Reveal My Blogging Secrets, my first attempt at the Pet Blogger Challenge, a blog hop collaboration between Amy Burkert, owner/author of Go Pet Friendly (dot) com and its blog, Take Paws, and Edie Jarolim, author of the book Am I Boring My Dog: And 99 Things Every Dog Wishes You Knew and its (now retired) blog Will My Dog Hate Me?. Today (5 days late, but with several excellent excuses), I make my second attempt (thanks, Amy).

I'll be sticking to the Q&A format, since the thought of writing a narrative makes me want to self-medicate with bloody Mary(s) Irish coffee peanut butter and chocolate.

*****

1. How long have you been blogging?

Slightly over two years, but it feels more like 12. (Not that that's bad!)

2. What do you consider the most important goals you set out in last year's post?

I only had one (sort of) and that was to market some Jon Farleigh and Dewi t-shirts. I did that (by setting up a Cafe Press blog store). Wisely, I did not include t-shirt sales as a goal. ;-) (The stuff's just way too expensive. And also, I'm no t-shirt designer.)

3. Have your goals changed over the past year?

Yes. 

4. How often do you post?

(Hold on, I should probably first [formally] introduce you to my "elephant," Shirley. As in, Shirley you've noticed a change in my posting frequency!)

About once a week (down from every weekday in 2011)...and I have worked hard to get to this point!

The truth is, I've spent much of this last year trying to recover from a gruesome case of blog burnout (the pinnacle of which occurred when I wrote this post, which I should aptly re-title "A Newbie Blogger's Cautionary Tale"). Or maybe it was blog addiction. At any rate, I came inches away from walking away from this (virtual) space, but after some drastic changes in blogging habits (including posting less - for now), I have grown more attached to the blog, as a creative outlet, than ever before. 

5.  If you post "as the spirit moves you" (vs. on a schedule), why? How do you think this affects your audience? How do you know when something is "post-worthy"?

A. Because on a schedule, the "spirit" was moving me to beat my blog with a rubber hose.

B. I expect most of my audience isn't affected at all (some might even welcome fewer posts to read). One or two, though, might miss the daily posting. ;-( 

C. When I can't get it out of my head.  

6. How much time do you spend writing your blog per week? How much time visiting other blogs? Can you share some tips for keeping on top of it all?

(Wait! Do you see the other..."ELEPHANT"? Yeah, that's Ima. As in, Ima SELFISH [recovering blog addict] TART for not commenting on your blogs [or replying to most of my own blog comments]. Please refer to #4 and accept my lowly apology.)

A. 2-5 hours (double if I'm forced to write it using my stupid mini notebook, like now)

B. 2-5 hours of lurking (I use a blog reader - Feedly - in Google Chrome.)

C. That's funny!

7.  How do you measure the success of a post and of your blog in general (comments, shares, traffic)?

A published post is a "successful" post. :-) As for the blog, "success" is such a subjective term. I'd be lying if I said I'd keep writing even if no one bothered to read. I need an audience (for accountability and feedback). This blog has done huge things for my self-confidence (as a creative writer) and my writing/social media skills. It's the reason why I've gotten involved with fostering and volunteering at a local animal shelter. And then, there are all of you (reading this when you could be pinning or shopping on Etsy, for example). I suppose if that's not success, I'm exceptionally blessed as a blogging failure.

8. If you could ask the pet blogging community to help with one issue you're having with your blog, what would it be?

I'd ask for patience, but not with the blog, with me. 

9. What goals do you have for your blog in 2013?

To have fun! To tell inappropriate and embarrassing tales! To upload way too many photos of my pets! But mostly, to simply keep posting (until the ideas run out...or a Cardigan Welsh Corgi jumps a wakeboard over a shark, whichever comes first)!

Thanks for reading and for being awesome!

*****

Have you seen all these other insightful "Challenge" posts?

Why Agreeing to Pay Google to Store My (Excessive) Blog Images Was a Wise Decision

Disclosure: I had some trouble deciding what to title this post, and because I find writing blog post titles so enjoyable (really, I do; can't you tell?), I've decided to go ahead and list a few of today's "honorable" almost-a-title mentions. (Of course, by that last sentence I mean that I have spent the last several days wasting time thinking up one brilliant title after another and, therefore, have had precious little time to think of anything else. ahem.)

So in case you've forgotten, the title of this post is:
Why Agreeing to Pay Google to Store My (Excessive) Blog Images Was a Wise Decision 

And here are a few "honorable" mentions: 

Dearly Beloved, We Are Gathered Here Today to Remember My (un-backed-up and deceased) Hard Drive

An Entire Photo Directory (and your not-printed holiday card address list...blah blah) Is a Terrible Thing to Waste!

Been Told Your Dead Hard Drive Took All Your Files to the Grave? Don't Buy It! For the Bargain Price of an Arm and HALF a Leg, Our Skilled Clairvoyants Engineers Can (probably) Get It to Give Up Its Ghost! 

126 Compelling Reasons Why Using a Steno Pad-Sized Mini Laptop (as your back-up blogging tool) Is Inefficient (and will make you cranky)

For $100 and a Free Spin: What are R S T L N and E? The Letters That Stick on My Mini Laptop's Keyboard!

Said My Hard Drive..."I've Shut Down and I Can't Boot Up!"

Said My Hard Drive to Me..."This Might Hurt (you) a Little (bwahahaha!)"

WOE, THEREFORE, UNTO ME!
(P.S. I dare you to say that out loud and not crack a smile.)

and finally,

Dear God, The Dogs Might Have Mistaken the Canada Goose Poop for Manna from Heaven. Please Advise.

[*#%&8#...oops. is my mic still on?]

*****

And now, a message from one of our sponsors:

Be sure to tune in next time when she might actually remember to include a post with her title.

Note: The image of Jon Farleigh (plus editing) is brought to you today by the $5/year Google+ image storage plan. (Now, if only I had proactively organized those 1,500+ images.)

;-p

Take the Quiz!: What Do Rudolph (the RNRD) and Jon Farleigh Have in Common?

Yes, you read that right:

What do Rudolph (the Red-Nosed Reindeer) and Jon Farleigh have in common?

 

(So, how well do you think you really know my dog?)

Take this short (5-question) quiz and find out!

Click this button to start!

(If survey doesn't load, click HERE.)

Well, how did you do?! Any "ah-ha" moments? :-)

 

 

P.S. Happy 3rd birthday to my precious "Baby New Year," Jon Farleigh, and his beautiful littermates, Georgia, Bridget, Lily, FlipFlop and Luke!

 

P.P.S. Happy New Year, friends!!! Here's to a really SHINY one!