Saturday, August 24, 2013

Dwayne's World Presents: Bohemian Dog Rhapsody (a song parody)

In case you aren't aware (and most of you won't be), I used to employ Dwayne (pictured above) on the blog as a roving tabloid reporter (of sorts). Here's his job experience. He was pretty good, if you ask me. But a while back - rumor has it - he went on a reporting sabbatical in the Chihuahuan Desert, and after that, well, word was he hooked up with some frizzy red-headed guy named Darth, and the two of them...they got into this retro, public-access TV thing (as in: they had their own show called Dwayne's World - consisting mostly of a bunch of mindless blather and music videos). 

Yeah, I wasn't buying any of that malarkey (who does public-access TV anymore?), but then (out of the clear blue sky) I heard from Dwayne himself. And he told me it was all true. And he sent me something for all of you (sort of a belated adios, and have a nice life e-card). I think you'll like it. ;)

Such a talent, that Dwayne. Gosh, I miss him.


 Dwayne's World presents...

You'll laugh. You might cry. But, please don't hurl; it's unbecoming.

Bohemian Dog Rhapsody

by Knave
(Queen canine cover band)

Tip: Click the PLAY button on the player below for the instrumental/karaoke track, so you can sing along! DO IT! ☺

♪♫♪♫ Is this my life?
It seems such a tragedy. 
Caught in a warped mind.
No escape from this parody.
Open your eyes.
It's just make believe, you see?
I'm just a red boy, from a red family.

And I am easy come, easy go
Never high, always low
Any way the wind blows, it's just passing gas to me.


Mama, just licked a (small) man.

Put my tongue upon his head
Dragged it hither, now he's wet.
Mama, I had just begun
But he squealed, and then he shoved my head away.
Mama, ooooh

Didn't mean to get his eye
But it'll dry, and if not, I'll need to borrow...
The ShamWow, the ShamWow
As if slobber really matters.


I see a boy who stacks legos with his hands.
Wants a pooch; wants a pooch
Have you tried the Petango?
Thunderbolt and lightning, pups might find it frightening
Try these (thundershirts - not an endorsement).

Galileo! Galileo! Galileo!




But I'm just a red boy and everybody loves me.
He's just a red boy, from a red family.

Spare him his pride from this blog malady.
Easy come, easy go - will you let him go?
Pepto Bismol! No - she will not let him go - let him go!
Pepto Bismol! She will not let him go - let him go!
(blah blah blah)
Never let me go - let me go!
Never let me go - oooh
No, no, no, no, no, no, no
Oh, mama mia, mama mia, mama mia, let me go.

The peeps at have a web page set aside for me.
For me.
For meeeeee!

(Hint: click image to crank up the volume!)

So you think you can make me a frat boy who smells pie?
Wrap bacon round my neck then leave me high and dry?

I Smelta Pie

Oh, baby, you must me bat-$#*t crazy!
I just gotta get out, just gotta get up outta here!


Ooh yeah, ooh yeah
As if slobber really matters
Really, can't you see?
Slobber doesn't matter to me.

♪♫♪♫ Any way the wind blows...

The End


"Nothing really matters...but moi!" - Miss Piggy



  1. Gosh now that was an epic blast from the past. Pawsome. Have a serene Sunday.
    Best wishes Molly

  2. This comment has been removed by the author.

  3. Oh my gosh!! I just laughed until tears came!! The parody, the ON girlfriend!!

  4. OMD, too funny! Love the thundershirts bit.

    I don't know if you'll ever be able to top this one. You've thrown down quite the challenge for yourself!

  5. My neck hurts from banging my head... and my cheeks hurt from laughing. Do they have a special wrap or towel for these new issues of mine? Wait! I just got fwapped with a cardi tail so all's cured!

  6. OMD!!! This was awesome!!! I'm a '90s kid, which is the reason why I'm crying from laughter as we speak! I remember seeing "Wayne's World" for the first time as a kid and not understanding a single joke but loving the movie anyway! ;-)

  7. Freddie would love it! Fabulous!


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