Disclosure: There's no beach in our backyard. Just pretend the brown grass is sand.
Also...
Merrick has given me (for free) 100% of their summer seasonals dog food pictured and 88.6% of the creative spark for this blog post. The dogs' good looks, tacky holiday-themed accessories, singing voices and opinions, however, are 100% their own.
And with that, here's Jon Farleigh.
[Shhh, y'all. Please don't let on that you've noticed his outfit. You wouldn't believe how hard it was for me to get him to go on camera like this!]
Thanks for coming, everybody; I'm Jon Farleigh.
When I think of summertime, six things come to mind:
When I think of summertime, six things come to mind:
- Meat
- Getting hot
- Cooling off
- Meat and fish
- Foods that go well with meat and fish
- Singing festive songs
OK, maybe there's an extra meat in there, but it's like this: When I'm slinking around the backyard and all that grill smoke goes wafting by my nostrils, it just makes thinking about anything but meat near impossible. Shoot, I should've added a third (and in all caps) MEAT to that list! (Next year, for sure!)
Tip: Click the play button down below for a heightened sensory grilling-experience.
But before I get going here, let's just make a couple things clear (for us dogs):
- Meat is good, but GRILLS ARE HOT! Just DO NOT get on, nor anywhere near, them while the peeps are charring that meat! Have you ever smelled burning fur? No? Well, I smelled some burning peep fur that got caught in the hair dryer, and let me tell you, IT SMELLS BAD. Nasty, burning fur smell does NOT mingle well with burning meat smell. Plus, singed fur. Just no.
- Meat is good, but the human kind, with the grease and sticky marlinades (sp?) and stuff? It WILL MAKE YOUR colon BLOW (pardon my French), if you eat too much! And by too much, I mean, not even enough to make you full! Yes, it sucks! But think of your colon, and - for the love of regularity - be happy with the measly scraps they throw you!
Hold up; I dropped my
OK, I'm back.
Hey, you know that old peep saying that you "can't have your cake and eat it too"? (Ha, you can have it IN YOUR BELLY. Sorry, I digress.) Well, guess what? It doesn't apply to grilled meat! Nope, thanks to the magic chefs at Merrick - who cooked up all their new, summer seasonals* recipes - we can have our grilled meat (no flames required) AND...EAT IT ALL! (OK, not all, as in a whole truckload of a seasonals recipe, but enough to fill your regular-sized dinner plate!) Woo hoo! Yay for summer and Merrick dog food!
Do you know what else? With all the delicious, summer music-inspired recipe names, I thought Dewi and I would do a little karaoke for you all! Maybe your peep'll get you some of this mouth-slobbering summertime food, so you can have some dinner while you watch! It'll be like we're having a virtual barbecue on the brown grass dog beach!
Hey, Dewi, you're up! Get over here!
(to Jon Farleigh, off camera) Yeah, man. What am I supposed to be doing?
(Jon Farleigh, from off camera) Turn around and talk to the party-ers, ya dork!
(Dewi, to himself) Takes one to know one, butt munch.
Oh, hey, y'all. Having fun yet? What was that? You say, "your fun quotient will rise a thousand percent when JF and me get up and sing"?? Well, HOT DOG! Let's get this party started, baby!
Yee haaaaaaaaaaw!
Inspired by Summer Lovin' Stew™...
Yee haaaaaaaaaaw!
Summer Nights (Olivia Newton-John and John Travolta, Grease original soundtrack)
Click the play button to hear the song!
♪♪ Summer lovin' had me a blast.
♪♪ Summer lovin' happened so fast.
♪♪ Met a girl crazy for me.
♪♪ Met a boy cute as can be.
♪♪ Summer days drifting away
To, uh oh, those summer nights.
Well-a well-a well-a huh?
::: CUT! :::
Oh, NO! The karaoke stops right here, y'all! There's nothing more to tell here, got it?!
(darn straight.)
Alright, alright. That's not the only song we're playing. Check this out...
Inspired by Surf n' Turf USA™...
Surfin' USA
(The Beach Boys)
Click play, if you wanna hear it!
Click the play button to hear the song!
♪♪ Summer lovin' had me a blast.
♪♪ Summer lovin' happened so fast.
♪♪ Met a girl crazy for me.
♪♪ Met a boy cute as can be.
♪♪ Summer days drifting away
To, uh oh, those summer nights.
Well-a well-a well-a huh?
::: CUT! :::
Oh, NO! The karaoke stops right here, y'all! There's nothing more to tell here, got it?!
(darn straight.)
Alright, alright. That's not the only song we're playing. Check this out...
Surfin' USA
(The Beach Boys)
Click play, if you wanna hear it!
♪♪ If everybody had an ocean
Across the USA.
Then everybody'd be surfin'
Like Californi-a.
♪♪ You'd see 'em wearing their baggies
Huarache sandals too.
A bushy bushy blond hairdo
Surfin' USA.
:::CUT!:::
What the heck is this song even about, man? I'm talking about surf n' turf! Steak and shrimp! If everybody had an ocean, everybody'd need a fishing pole! And what the fudge pudding does a bushy bushy blond hairdo have to do with it?! Maybe we can see the hibachi sandals...wait. HIBACHI SANDALS? Surfer shoes double as hibachi's??
OMD, that's just DUMB!
But speaking of shrimp, hold up, y'all! It's time for our
OK, next up: our finale! Let's leave this
The Star-Spangled Banner
(Francis Scott Key, lyrics)
You know the drill!
♪♪ O! Say can you...
:::CUT!:::
You know what? Some songs are better left unsung by two hammy Cardigan corgis, agreed? But the kids who're singing in that sound clip? Give them a listen, K?
What an AWESOME country this is, y'all!
Hey, wasn't this fun? Let's do it again sometime, OK? Bye, now!
(Jon Farleigh to a fan on the front row) What's that? A pawtograph? Yeah, find me in the yard later.
* Just like their year-round wet dog food recipes, Merrick seasonals (in addition to having punny names) are always grain-free, contain real, deboned meat as the first ingredient, and are made in the USA, in Merrick's own kitchen, using locally sourced ingredients. Give them a follow on Facebook and Twitter for the latest news and deals!
Psst! Hey, you! Wait up a minute. I'm Chef Bobby Flay O'Fish, and you can't leave without one LAST song from me, the feline grilling (and Cardi-house) master himself!
Though, please note: I DO NOT eat dog food. But I do eat Merrick CAT food when it's served.
Here we go: Barnyard on the Grill (by Jeff YokeUp Petkevicius)!
Ahem.
♪♪ Barnyard on the grill
It's a barnyard on the grill.
It's cows and pigs and chicken on a heap
Cuz that's what we all love to eat!
(repeat verse)
Let's go barbecue!
{drops mic}
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