This Picture Is Worth 1,000 Words Wednesday: A Red Dog Lying Alone on the Floor

Here's the picture:

Think you can guess the 1,000 (give or take)-word backstory?

How about a hint (or 18)?

Well? Can you guess the words, now? (Poor Jon Farleigh; he's always drawing the short {and narrow} straw!)☺

Have you ever seen such afflicted dog expressions? Do you have pets who jockey for the same chair or bed or blanket? Who wins?

Note: Photos were previously published in 2011.

Classic Cardigan: I Just Ruined the Most Adorable Wordless Wednesday With a Butt Crack Story

The dog made me do it. 

Preface: The first time I published this story (on a Wednesday), "Wordless Wednesday" was in the title; "butt crack," however, was not. Also, #TongueOutTuesday was not a thing back then. If it had been, I wouldn't have ruined #WordlessWednesday (nope, I would've ruined #TongueOutTuesday instead).

Oh, and also:

#DidYouKnow? The scientific name for butt crack (two words) is intergluteal cleft. Yep, said Google AND Wikipedia. http://t.co/Qw7D8FFS99

— Elizabeth Keene (@ChroniclesCardi) May 12, 2015

"Intergluteal cleft" was too long to put in the blog title. (If you were following me on Twitter, you'd know this kind of trivia before the general population. Just saying.)

<end of preface>

Don't you hate it when you bend over to pat a friendly dog out in public and your pants (both under and outer) ride down to where the sun don't (naturally) shine?! Oh my gosh, I do too! Especially when my spouse tells me about it AFTER the fact. Like this one time...


I did it. I finally got photographic proof of a pet (of mine) with her tongue partway out. 

Anyone know why dogs and cats do this sometimes - forget to put their tongues back in? I mean, I think I'd notice if my tongue was sticking partway out. Wouldn't you? Of course, there was this one time (last weekend) when I showed half my butt to some innocent bystanders at the dog mall. (Not on purpose, OK? I'd bent way over to pet a happy westie.) Never mind that the victims were a sweet older couple from my church. Anyway, the point is, I didn't know I'd mooned them until after they'd walked away, because my spouse - who'd witnessed the whole thing, in helpless, humored bewilderment - told me so.

I swear I didn't notice when it happened - not even the slightest breeze! And, you can count on this: I will NEVER again exclaim behind a girlfriend's back, "That hussy totally knows half her @ss is hanging out the top of her pants! Sheesh, what is wrong with people?! And trade that thong for some granny panties while you're at it!" Nope, you'll never hear such ugliness from me again. 

Furthermore, why hasn't anyone invented an "alarm" to prevent this kind of thing yet? Like something one can clip to the inside of one's waistband, that delivers a harmless electric shock whenever there's a change in brightness and/or temperature in the cheek-al area? Let's see that on Shark Tank and then, on QVC! Wouldn't you buy one? Oh, come on, humor me, people! 

Well, fine, go on and be that way! Here, just look at these adorable pictures of my sweet Tigger with her tongue poking out!

This is so cute, I've just gotta squee! ♥

Now please, have a great day. And remember, crack kills!

Getting Jon Farleigh to Lie Down Blooper - Captions, please!

For those with taller dogs (or short dogs who are not yet trained to lie down): Do you know how difficult it can be to get a dog to lie down for a treat lure when the dog can touch its snout to the floor without bending its knees?

I give you Exhibit A:

That is me (one year ago) trying to lure nine-month-old Jon Farleigh into a "down." Besides the fact that he had been trained to "down" already (and he knew the voice command, but just simply chose to forget it for this public event), this is generally what one sees when attempting to train a Corgi "down" for the first time. Can you really blame them, though. Helloooo? :)

OK, so I can see lots of fun captions in this photo (from the mouth of just about any living being in it).
Hint: see the other dogs' faces? :)

It would MAKE MY DAY if you would give it your best shot in the comments!

Wordless Wednesday - The Face That Had Me Before Hello

All photos taken with my Nikon S9100 and edited at picnik.com using texture effects.

Wordless Wednesday - A BlogPaws 'Ending' Fit for a Queen

...or a blogger named Elizabeth. :) 

I'll reveal the identity of this lovely "ending" tomorrow. :)

(Hint: Go ahead and double-click the photo. You won't be sorry.)

We're participating in a Wordless Wednesday blog hop! Click HERE to play along.

Words of Wisdom Wednesday :)

My dashboard:

My passenger:

The words:

*****

More words: Unless you're allergic, don't sweat the small stuff.

Happy Wednesday!

*****

We're participating in BlogPaws' Wordless Wednesday blog hop. The link will take you there, too. :)

It's Almost Wednesday Wordless Wednesday???

It is late here and I am unable to string coherent thoughts. So here is a photo of Dewi:

This was taken right after we left the CGC test venue on Sunday.

Just so you know, he would've had the same expression even if he had failed. :)

Antlers taste good! Bully sticks smell good!

Note: I did not eat an antler and happen to think bully sticks are a far cry from fragrant. The title is, therefore, based solely on my observation of Jon Farleigh and Dewi. People should not eat this stuff, okay?

Have you ever played along with the Wordless Wednesday: Caption Contest at Richmond Pet Lovers Blog? We did and wound up winning the March drawing for a $25 gift certificate to BestBullySticks! (Especially cool since we are bent on never winning anything.)

We received our "free" $25-worth of stuff yesterday.

As you might guess, BestBullySticks sells lots of bully sticks, but they also sell lots of other doggie treats and stuff, like deer antlers for safe chewing.

Size Large, sold for $10 each (on sale)

I was really excited about getting to try the antlers since they're usually expensive (compared to raw bones and rawhide) and I've never been able to justify spending the extra cash. I ordered two in the Large size (about 5" long), and as you can see, one of them is nearly gone after only one day! Jon Farleigh went to town!

So obviously, he loved it, but although there was no mess and I didn't notice him being able to break potentially dangerous chunks off, for the money, I'd expect this chew treat to last a good while longer. (BTW - Dewi enjoyed his antler, too, but he's not nearly the chewer that Jon Farleigh is.)

Antlers contain mineral-packed marrow and are great for teeth and gum health.

Confession: Ever since I discovered what a "bully stick" actually is, I've been less than thrilled about purchasing them for my dogs. [gulp] But, since these were "free," I decided to give them a try. Correction: I decided to let the dogs try them - which they haven't yet. They have to finish the antlers first. [gulp]

I opted for two of the 6" odor-free braids.

Since I've never given them to my dogs before, I can't vouch for this, but I have heard that bully sticks smell really bad, especially when all slimy-like.  That's why I went with the odor-free variety, although they still smell slightly funky to me.

If any indication, JF and Dewi could smell them from across my kitchen and came running to investigate.

They look healthy enough.  [double gulp] 

This was in the box, too. Ahem.

Eyes on me, not the antler.

"Give. me. NOW!"

Practicing resource guarding "leave it" skill.

Dewi putting his foot down (literally) to claim his remnant.

"How exactly am I supposed to chew this now?"

(Don't tell Dewi, but I think the remnant might be trash can bound since it could be a choking hazard.)

Hope everyone has a terrific Wednesday (no bull)!

P.S. If the weather cooperates, we're taking the dogs to Bark in the Park night at The Diamond today. Yes, in the stands at a local Minor League baseball game, complete with a Flying Squirrel mascot. I must be crazy. Photos later.

It's Wordless Wednesday - Lazy Tongues and Half Moons - Sure to Bring Vertical Smiles

Sorry, but there be some words here, too.

I finally caught on camera one of my critters with the "lazy tongue".

Anyone know why dogs/cats do this sometimes? I mean, I think I'd notice if my tongue was sticking partly out. Wouldn't you? Of course, there have been reported incidents of me flashing my half-moon to innocent bystanders at the dog mall (while bending down to pet other dogs - NOT because I'm a flasher). (Nevermind that the poor victims happened to be the nice older couple from church.)

I insist I didn't notice when it happened - not even the slightest breeze to tip me off. I tell you, you won't ever catch me exclaiming judgementally again, "You'd think the hussy would notice that half her *ss is hanging out the top of her pants! Sheesh, get some bigger underwear." Nope, not ever saying that about someone else again.

Furthermore, I think someone should invent a personal "shock" alarm that fits inside the waistband of one's pants, which, upon changes in light and/or temperature, would discreetly zap the wearer back into a proper solar (as opposed to lunar) position. Raise your hand if you agree. Oh, sheesh, humor me, people. I can totally see your vertical smiles. :)

Fine! Here are the stinkin' cat tongue pictures.

Happy Rump Hump Day!   And remember, crack kills.

I Have No Words - (less Wednesday) - Baddogs